Mantra to say after talking to my mother

"I will not break this phone.  I will not break this phone.  I will not break this phone.  I will not break this phone...."


Due to her stroke, she has aphasia.  This means she often swaps words... either the words she says, or the words she hears.  Basically, her speaking interface is kinda broken, like a broken Star Trek translator.

And she thinks with the emotional side of her brain, since it was the logical side that had the stroke.  And that's also the highly suspicious part of her brain, and resentful, and basically uncooperative side of her brain.  And aggravating side of her brain.  And...

I have broken the work phone handset by hanging up on her, and then lifting the handset back up and pounding it, oh, about 4 times on my desk.  For some bizarre reason, although other people could hear my speak, I had to turn up the phone volume to max to hear other people.  Hmmm.  Very strange.  As if I had done something outside the normal working parameters of the phone.  What, you mean I'm not supposed to expect the phone to work after heartily pounding it on my desk?

After another phone call, I destroyed the hearing-side of one of our cordless home phones, as well as it's crystal display.  The only way to answer phone calls with that phone was to answer it then put it in speaker mode.

We've got people who asked to come over today.  2 or 3 of the same people were there yesterday.  I called my Mom to let her know, and make sure the time was ok.

Mom: "They were already here today."

Me: "What?  No, you mean yesterday,"

Mom: "Yes, they were here today."

Me: "They were here this morning??"

Mom: "Well, there were 2... 2... 3 people here..."

Me: "Mom, what TIME this morning were they here?"

Mom, after consulting with her caregiver:"10."

Me: "Mom, that's impossible because it's 9:45am!"

Mom: "They were here today!"

Me: "Mom, let me talk to your caregiver."

Mom: "You don't believe me?  Well, shit, son of a bitch, here!"

Talked to caregiver, confirmed those same people had been there YESTERDAY.

Talked to mom again.

Mom: "You didn't believe me..."

Me: "No, Mom, I did believe you.  It's just you were using the wrong word.  You meant 'Yesterday', and you kept saying 'Today'."

Mom: "Oh.  Well, you know I can't make sense."

Me: "Yes, I know.  Anyway, the same people will be there again at 3:30pm."

Mom: "Oh, that's ok.  Thank you for letting me know."

Me: "You're welcome."  Click.

I will not break this phone.  I will not break this phone.  This is a new phone to replace the phone I broke.  I will not break this phone... I will REALLY NOT break this phone....

Screw life, we're going to talk about a movie!

Or maybe a few movies.

My life has been too stressful.  So instead, let's discuss some really good and really bad movies to watch and to not watch, respectively.

First of all, if things are so bad that you need something horrific to watch in order to deal, especially in order to work through some anger, I highly recommend the following movie:

"The Descent"

It has gotten me through a great deal of stress.  It is very depressing in places, I admit.  But the main characters, and how they change into very strong, and yes, violent, people in order to survive... oh, man.  When you are very angry at your circumstances, sometimes it is just so nice to see the "victims" in the movie kick some serious asshole butt.

And this is also just one of those perfect movies that does the character building, and gets you all spooked and concerned, even before they pull all the stops out.  It's already intense before they even let the monsters come out to play.

It's good horror in the way that Alien is absolutely good horror.  It captures you.  It has a good plot.  It maintains believability.  The characters are engaging.  Just trust me and watch it, damn it.

"Paranormal Activity"

Excellent movie.  Watched it maybe 1 or 2 months ago.  Hard to watch in the sense that you want these people to get help, get the priests out and/or move, if it would help.  One character treats the experience like an experiment for most of the time.  The other one, who has more experience with this sort of thing in her past, is frustratingly mocked by the first character, who has no clue what he's playing with.

Don't watch it when your significant other is away on travel.  Or you'll be sleeping with the lights on.

"Paranormal Activity 2"

This was also an excellent movie.  But if you are a parent / dog owner and are going through a sensitive time, do NOT watch it.  There's nothing explicit, but that feeling of wanting to protect the child or the dog may make it too hard to watch.  For me, I ended up sitting there furious at the demon that was harassing the child and the dog.  And furious at the father, who had his head in the sand and was refusing to believe anything weird was happening.  And furious ... just furious.  Probably because my husband is on travel, and I have a toddler and 2 dogs.  And I was pissed off at being frightened and then feeling the need to sleep with the lights on, lol.  It was VERY hard not to wake up my toddler and make him sleep in bed with me.  But hey, he hadn't watched the movie.  He was sleeping peacefully, except for a sunburn I stupidly forgot to protect him from.  He didn't need me projecting my fear onto him.

So I let him sleep, and prayed alot of prayers to God for protection.

So, yeah, choose wisely when you watch it.  And if you are wiser still in realizing that maybe movies that touch on the occult are not a good thing to add to your life, then don't watch it.  I both enjoyed the movie, and regret watching it, you know?  Not sure God wanted me putting that movie into my memory banks.

Just like you shouldn't consume poison, and you shouldn't drink yourself stupid, there are ideas or memories you shouldn't intentionally put into your head, if you can help it.  Heh.  Call it "brain poison".

I guess "The Descent" might qualify as brain poison, I don't know.  So, take my movie advice with a grain of salt.


"Shaun of the Dead"

Fantastically funny movie.  It's so good I don't want to tell you anything and spoil it, lol.  Just watch it.  Trust me.  Probably the best movie to watch if you are down in the dumps but don't feel the need to get some anger out of your system.  It's the sort of dark comedy that will leave you feeling ironically better after you've watched it.

If it's brain poison... well... it's got to be one of the less damaging and sweeter ones, lol.

Ok, will come back with more movies that are helping to keep me sane, or less insane.  And the occasional one that will hurt more than help.

Anyway, yes, I'm still here.  Just having a hard time keeping my head above water.  As usual.  ;)