Patio Floor 1, Logan 0

Logan tripped on the rail for the sliding glass door and did a 360 onto the patio floor. :P During his tumbling "experiment", he unfortunately used his nose as a pivot point.

His nose didn't fare so well.

The dot on his forehead isn't part of it... it's just food he rubbed off his hands and onto his forehead.

Asses of Fire

It's 4:57am. The Friday after Thanksgiving.

If I have the runs one more time, I think I will implode. :P

I don't think it's a food bug. I think I just ate alot of stuff I really shouldn't have.

Still, other than the runs, Thanksgiving was quite nice. :)

It was my baby boy Logan's first Thanksgiving. He turns 1 year old on December 5th.

My husband and Logan and I met my parents at the Frog Bar and Grill at 1:30pm for a Thanksgiving brunch. My Dad had to be at work at 4:30pm, so eating a brunch worked out quite well. And the weather was lovely, in spite of all the rain and fear of flooding after all the fires in the area. The sun came out, expansive blue skies, and everything.

Logan got to have scrambled eggs and pieces of a croissant. And of course cheerios. Can't have a meal w/o cheerios anymore. ;) I also offered him pieces of a cantaloupe and pieces of a sweet potato, but I don't think he ate any of it.

My Father-in-Law spent Thanksgiving with my husband's brother, so he missed out on our fun, but got to enjoy time with his great-grand-kids. I think he may have wished he could be in 2 places at the same time, as he seemed a little bummed about missing Logan's first Thanksgiving. But he still had an awesome time with the rest of the family. :)

What did I eat... what did this to me. Let's see. Pre-brunch was a Jimmy Dean breakfast croissant with sausage, egg, and cheese. But not all of it. And some of Logan's cheerios. And some green tea.

Brunch was 2 orange juices, 2 champagnes, croissant, sweet potato, stuffing, cucumber, bell pepper salad, smoked salmon, scrambled eggs, strawberries, cantaloupe, and I think that's it. All small portions: it all fit on one plate, except the eggs were on a separate plate that I then used to feed Logan from. Well, the champagne probably dehydrated me.

Then when we went home, after some tea, and after a bottle (for Logan, not for me, LOL), went down with Logan for a nap at 4:30pm. Woke up at 6pm. Fed Logan. And ate... the wrong thing. Obviously. Chips and hot cheese dip. Lots. And a strawberry frozen fruit bar. And chocolate milk. And a turkey/cheese/bread sandwich husband called a "Royal George", but now he's not so sure of the name. Normally also includes mayo, but I included mustard instead.

Did have some of Logan's banana, and more of his Cheerios. But that was the only healthy thing this Thanksgiving evening.

Anyway, something I ate was the wrong thing.

So far, poor Logan is having the opposite problem: he is pooing less than normal. It takes time for a baby's system to become used to new food. Really, to solid food in general. It's just a new way of digesting. I think he's just overwhelmed by the whole "chewing" experience, LOL. Ok, "gumming" -- he only has 8 teeth, and they are all incisors. However, judging by the drooling, chewing on anything that's immobile and not nailed down, and general grumpiness, he's definitely trying to cut a tooth.

Well, campers, it's after 5am. My intestines feel like they may be done for the moment. And the Tylenol PM is winning over my feeling like crap from the runs, so I think I can finally get some sleep. At least until Logan wakes up, LOL. ;)

I think Friday is going to be an oat-meal and banana and Cheerios kind of day.

Ok, I was going to post this before I crawled back into bed at 5am, but didn't do it. Doing it now.

Tastes like chicken

I haven't posted since July 30th 2008. Whoa.

What's happened since then? Let me see.

August: uhm... hmph. It's like a blur. September: we had our 10th Wedding Anniversary. My parents had their ... 41st? 42nd? Let's see... I'm 40, it took Mom a year to talk Dad into having me... probably 42nd.

October: Logan had his first Halloween. :) Dressed him up as Yoda. Pics are up on Flickr, but more pics need to be uploaded due to not everything getting offloaded from our digital camera. 'Course, he didn't like wearing the ears, and his head was too big for the ears to be snapped up underneath his chin, so he was sorta Obi-Wan Kenobi for the rest of the night. :)

I let him play with my lightsaber. Yes, I'm 40, and I own a lightsaber. *Brrrrssshhhhnnnnnnng* Want to make something of it?

I bought it from ThinkGeek a few years ago. Makes all kinds of cool sound effects. It's red. Of course. :)

Logan liked it. Kept touching the part that, if it were real, would have sliced his hands off, but I'll teach him the importance of only touching the hilt when he's old enough. :)

Yes, yes, I'm such a geek.

Ended up with ALOT of Halloween candy left over. Not too many trick-o-treaters this year. Bummer. I think the trend of going to "safe shopping malls" where stores are handing out candy is affecting our foot traffic. :P

Ok, that and I didn't decorate until the very last minute. I've heard that if you want foot traffic, you want to decorate at least a week in advance. Apparently the kids scope out the houses prior to the event to ensure they hit the high-candy spots.

Early November we went to our niece's son's 1st birthday party. I think their son had a good time. Our son took over one of the blankets laid on the grass and started playing with their son's toy humvee, LOL! But their son didn't seem to mind.

Logan is all about things that roll. Especially things with wheels. My Mom keeps saying I gave birth to a linebacker because of how quickly he's grown, but now I'm wondering if he's not going to be a race car driver!

And he's almost walking. He will hold onto things and kindof totter around. And he will let go and stand and maintain his balance for a few seconds before DOWN HE GOES! :)

Well, his first birthday is coming up. December 5th. Then his 2nd Christmas. Alot to do before both events.

He's eating more "real food". It just needs to be chopped up into tiny bits as he doesn't have any molars yet. Just 8 incisors. No eye-teeth. He likes cheerios, cut-up strawberries, cut-up cantaloup, and chopped+skinned grapes. I tried just chopping the grapes, but he ended up with grape skins in his mouth that he couldn't quite swallow, and that I had to fish out.

He's also had spaghetti with ground beef and Ragu. Finely chopped up, of course. And I tried to mash some peas for him, but he's still not doing so good on any vegetables that are of the green variety.

Ellie, our female, hasn't been feeling well. But her numerous expensive tests haven't shown that there is anything wrong with her. Am thinking she must be getting into stuff. So am trying to be more careful... ensure she can't eat anything in the fireplace (sometimes we burn pizza cartons in there), and making sure there aren't any candy wrappers for chocolate candies anywhere she can get them. I think that her extra-curricular eating has made her stomach a little fragile. Kindof like after you have a stomach illness, it's easier to upset your stomach by accident for a while.

Logan... who won't eat any green vegetables... surprised us the other day when he went to Ellie's dog dish and ate some of the dog food Ellie had left in there from this morning! I truly didn't think he would do that. I truly thought he was just going over there to push her dog dish around, as he likes to do that. [And thankfully our dogs aren't food aggressive, so he hasn't started any fights by doing that. Heh... watching the dogs trying to eat from a moving bowl has been quite entertaining at times!] But anyway, yes, Logan put dog food in his mouth. And was working on gumming it and swallowing it, but I raced over and started fishing that out of his mouth. And then I started worrying that whatever was upsetting Ellie's stomach was now going to start attacking Logan's tummy! This is of course assuming Ellie might have been fighting something viral or bacterial off.

However, if she was fighting something off, it apparently isn't contagious to humans. Either that or Logan has a cast iron stomach. ;)

Ok, can't think of anything else. I know I'm forgetting something, but that is the highlights, as far as I can remember it. Consider yourself up to date... that is, until I remember what I forgot to post. :)

Bad parents, no donut

We're sitting here watching Law and Order. It's nearly 2pm. Logan (our baby boy) is asleep on our bed in our nice, dark, cool bedroom, after having been fed a bottle.

The dogs are VERY attentive to us.

Me: "They must be hungry."

Husband: "Oh, we haven't fed them."

Me: "No... we only feed things that scream and cry."

Baby crawling still needs work

My husband and I were watching our son try to crawl on our bed. Forward crawling is no-where near sight, but there's a bit of reverse going on, but it feels partially unintentional. The concept of being up on his knees at the same time he's up on his hands is lost to him still. He covers a much larger distance when he rolls, although he also sometimes gets an arm stuck under him when doing this.

We watched him for a bit, encouraging him, laughing with him and playing with him. And it suddenly hit me:

Me: "He crawls like a defective hermit crab."

Tasty knees

I was on the floor with Logan. He rolled over to me and started sucking on my knee. [He's teething.]

Me: "Logan, there's no breast milk in my knee."

He started acting like my knee didn't taste very good.

Me, grinning: "I'm sorry I didn't do anything to enhance the flavor of my knee for you, Logan..."

Husband: "Damn you..."

Learning to walk on Coals...

Out of the frying pan, and into the fire...

So, learning how to walk on coals here. ;)

This is just getting bloody ridiculous.

Monday February 4th, after I had called my HR rep about my options for extending my maternity leave (in order to give myself more time to find daycare places with openings for Logan), I started to not feel so hot. Well, actually I started to feel very hot. And chilled. And cold. And sweaty. And shaky. And my back HURT.

My Father-in-Law was over, helping me out with Logan, so I could get stuff done around the house. His being at our place with Logan was also good therapy for him, considering he just lost his wife on January 18th.

I let him know that I thought I needed to go to the doctor, and asked him if he could watch Logan while I went. I wrapped myself up in a blanket and took my temperature. While shaking violently, I read it and realized it was nearly 102. And it had that feeling of something that wasn't finished increasing.

My Father-in-Law didn't like the idea of me driving myself while feverish, and I agreed. My parents weren't home. Hubby was busy. Father-in-Law put Logan in the car seat and drove all 3 of us in my car to the doc-in-a-box.

I had a urinary tract infection that had moved into my kidneys. Due to the C-section, I have reduced sensation in my bladder. Literally it's like I have a man's bladder... I can hold it until I finally sense I REALLY should find a bathroom. And unfortunately, the sensation of it burning when I peed was also reduced, so I didn't realize I'd come down with a urinary tract infection until it had already made it to my kidneys, causing my back to hurt. I did have a slight sensation of burning, but it was so slight, and I was so busy with Logan, etc., that I thought nothing of it at the time. It was just too low on the radar considering all the other blips I was dealing with.

The Doc thought my flu/cold may have also been coming back, as I also mentioned having a sore throat over the weekend. And of course there's the high fever. But in fact, the fever was entirely due to the fact that my body was trying to fight the infection off in the kidneys.

The Doc prescribed stuff for the flu/cold (just in case), for the fever, and for a urinary tract infection.

Hubby met me at the clinic. Father-in-Law took Logan back home. Hubby drove me home, where I crawled into bed and continued to shake violently. Hubby drove to Longs and picked up prescriptions, bringing them back after what seemed like an eternity to my fevered brain. I took meds, and ate a burger hubby brought back, and then curled back up into bed.

I couldn't stop shaking, and coming out from under the covers made me feel intolerably cold.

The next day I was feeling somewhat better. Father-in-Law came by to take care of me and Logan. By the afternoon, when it was too soon to take ibuprofin again for my fever, I got up past 102 again. I called to try to find the doc and see if I could take the ibuprofin earlier, but he wasn't at the clinic that day. I called hubby. Hubby came home and took me to the ER!

I whined when they wanted me to take my jacket off so they could take my blood pressure. I was so cold I couldn't stand it. My fever was getting close to 103. I was dehydrated. They gave me something for my fever, then tried to find a vein. I was super-sensitive to any skin pain due to the fever, and also feeling really sorry for myself. And highly emotional. Basically, I'm not at my best when I have a high fever. I cried like a baby when they kept having to stick me with needles to finally find a viable vein to pump fluids into. It was freaking embarrassing.

My fever broke finally with sufficient meds given to me to reduce it. Took about 1 or 2 hours. While it was going down, they tested my blood and my pee. They swabbed my nose to see if I had influenza. [I didn't.] They gave me antibiotics in the 2nd bag of saline they pumped into me. And they told me to quit taking my current antibiotics, and to start a course of CIPRO.

I was on @#$@^!Q#$ Cipro. They use that for Anthrax. I was on freaking Cipro.

Hubby dropped off the Cipro prescription on his way to work the next day, as we didn't get home from the ER until almost 10pm. My parents came by to take care of me, and picked up the prescription on their way in. I think. That whole week of dealing with the kidney infection is all a little fuzzy. Fevers are fun. :P

I spent most of that week sleeping alot. And not breast feeding Logan, as he couldn't have any breast milk with any of the 3 antibiotics I had in my blood by then. So I was pumping and dumping, and the plethora of baby bottles I had recently bought were suddenly coming in VERY handy for feeding Logan formula.

On Monday 2/11, I was well enough to take Ellie to the vet while my parents watched Logan. And that was about the extent of what I accomplished that day. But anyway, it was nice to actually drive my car instead of having someone else drive me due to my being too feverish!

Just to make life interesting, also on that day, my right boob felt like it had a clogged milk duct. But that passed thankfully on its own, w/o any extra doctor/ER trips.

On Tribe, I posted a prayer of sorts after having posted the above in my Tribe blog:

"Lord, please... we need help. My husband is SO tired of taking care of both Logan and me. I'm so tired of being exhausted, sick and useless. And I'm running out of time here... I need to be healthy and on top of things so I can find a daycare place and go back to work. Shoot, poor Logan is still stuffed up from catching our colds."

Yeah, I was feeling sorry for myself, and for Logan and for my Hubby. And for my tired Parents, and my tired and sad Father-in-Law. And for my Mother-in-Law's other Kids and her Sisters.

And I was just feeling really damned tired. :P

A couple of days later, Wednesday February 13th, I was in a better mood. A bunch of my Tribe friends had sent me their good wishes and prayers and comforting words, and I was getting my energy back. God was answering prayer, helping me to catch my breath.

Thursday the 14th I was able to start breast feeding again. Flow was a little slow... I hadn't been good about pumping alot while I was feeling so sick, as I was so tired all the time. But it picked back up, and I supplemented Logan's diet with formula until I'd talked my boobies into being good moo-cows again. ;)

I talked to my boss. He was ok with my taking 30 calendar days off at the end of the 12 weeks of maternity leave. If I were to go back at the end of the 12 weeks, my first day back at work would be Wednesday February 27th. Now, after I get the paperwork done, I'll be out until the end of March.

I need to fill out the stuff for "bonding", which provides 6 weeks of income from SDI I believe for bonding with Logan. I won't be able to use all 6 weeks of it... well, unless Logan has some illnesses that cause me to need to take 1 or 2 weeks off later on after this 30 calendar days off. Which is not a happy reason for doing more bonding with Logan, so I'll happily pass on that option, if given the choice, God willing.

I can't stand it when Logan isn't feeling well. He can break my heart by just pouting!!! When he cries because he isn't feeling well, I just wish I could take his pain away for him. And he can steal my heart away with his smiles. :)

Never thought I'd be a "baby person", LOL!

But anyway, the 30 calendar days will be paid for, at a percentage of my work wages, thanks to the "bonding" thing. Weee. :)

So, everything appears to be going ok so far.

I am feeling better. But I need to start researching daycare places again. I have contacted 2 places my Mom found for me. One requires that Logan be walking fairly well... which isn't going to happen for at least another 6 months -- more like 10 months? The other might be able to take Logan as early as June, or as late as Fall, and is ok with him being a non-walking baby in diapers. Since neither location is a public (i.e., advertised) place, they are both probably the best bets, as there won't be alot of other people trying to get into them. And they come highly recommended, so... :)

And I need to finish Logan's room. He'll still be sleeping in our room at night, but for naps, I should try to get him used to his crib. This was a recommendation from my late Mother-in-Law, as it would help in getting him used to sleeping in his room at night later on.

Damn, I miss my Mother-in-Law. She was really good with Logan, and alot nicer to me than I gave her credit for. :(

So, that's what's been going on.

As I said, I'm learning to walk on coals. And trying to just be glad for the good days, and not sweat the bad days too much.

Thank you everyone who's sent me warm wishes/positive mojo/prayers/kind words/etc. :)

Hope everyone out there is doing well. Godspeed. :)

The good, and the really really bad and ugly

Well, the good news:

• Getting easier to get Logan to sleep in his bassinett. Sometimes.
  
• My nipples have toughened up so breast feeding no longer hurts.
  
• Incision is mostly healed up... just a slight crack left. No longer has to be packed. I can drive, as I'm no longer on pain meds. And since it's no longer trying to heal too fast (outside first, then inside), as it was packed until it behaved, I'm also no longer on blood pressure medication.
  

Bad news:

• Hubby and I have a sore-throat/cold.
  
• My Mom can't baby sit as she realized her congestive heart failure was going to make it too hard on her. She can babysit for a couple of hours at a time, but that's it. No "all day" babysitting while I'm at work. Dad can't as he works... he's 84 and he works. :P They need the money.
  
• Hubby's Mom can't babysit. Because she PASSED AWAY FRIDAY 1/18/2008. Put us all in shock.
  

She would have been 78 on 1/30/2008.

She was so good with Logan. And so sweet. She was a 2nd Mom to me. To everyone, really.

Hubby's in shock. Hubby's Dad is in shock.

Funeral was this past Friday, 1/25/2008. A bunch of family flew/drove in for it. Sister-in-law got in the Sunday after her Mom died, and was a big help both with Hubby's Dad and with Logan.

Hubby's Dad and Sister adore Logan. Hubby's Dad may try his hand a little at some babysitting, but we can't really hold him to what Hubby's Mom had agreed to. Especially after all the stress of losing Hubby's Mom.

However, Hubby's Dad does LOVE spending time with Logan. And he also ironically loves our dogs... and our dogs adore him.

Hubby's Sister threatened to steal Logan away this week. Had to watch Logan and Sister-in-Law CLOSELY. ;)

Logan steals the hearts of any adults who get to know him. :)

Thought my breast-milk antibodies were protecting Logan from getting sick, as even though Hubby and I had been sick for almost a week already, Logan was fine. But unfortunately, last night, 1/26/2008, Logan started sounding congested. :( Poor little guy...

So now all 3 of us are miserable.

Logan still smiles at us. I can't believe how happy he can be with us even when he's feeling like crap. He IS a little angel.

Not sure when I have to go back to work now. My HR thinks I only get 12 weeks from the date the baby is born. But my ObGyn's office is sure I get 8 (maybe 10 now) weeks of medical leave for the c-section. [8 is normal, but it may be 10 as I had complications.] And then another 6 weeks for bonding on top of that. So 16 weeks total. And my ObGyn thinks that my job is protected for 12 weeks from the END of my medical leave.

So, per my ObGyn, I get SDI money for the 8 to 10 weeks of medical leave, then another 6 weeks of money for bonding. But then I could stay out of work an extra 6 weeks w/o any income if I wanted to. But I don't think I'll take that option.

Confused? Sorry... it's confusing me too. ;)

Need to get my HR and my ObGyn's office to agree. Stressing me out.

If HR is right, I return to work end of February. If my ObGyn is right, I return end of March. Really hoping for end of March here, LOL! I hope to have everything figured out by then... taking care of Logan, and also who is babysitting him while I'm at work. That and I HATE leaving him. He's stolen my heart.

So... that's what's been happening...

Should have listened...

Wednesday, January 9th, 2008, I saw my Gestational Diabetes doctor, to see if the blood test I took the prior week indicated I had regular diabetes now that I was no longer pregnant. Thank the Lord, I did NOT.

I will have to get tested for diabetes once a year, at my annual physical, to be sure, however. The fact that I had gestational diabetes means I still need to watch my blood sugars to ensure I don't still get the full blown diabetes later in life.

My diabetes doctor is a real sweetie, and gave me and my hubby a few of her hand-me-down baby equipment, including a car seat and a swing. She's also a Mom, having an adopted son at home.

Before I left, she heard Logan poo. She asked me if I'd like to change him in the examining room.

I should have listened to my gestational diabetes doctor...

I should have changed Logan then and there, when my doctor offered me the opportunity.

But NOOOOOOOO..... I was sure he would "keep" until I was done grocery shopping and got home.

She said that I knew best, as I was the mother, and not to feel guilty if someone else said I was doing something wrong.

Heh. Me, know best?!?

I think his dirty diaper was why he started crying. In Longs. Full blast. Without cease.

I left a cart full of groceries in Longs while I went back outside (with him) to get his bottle and a pacifier.

I got a clue before going back into Longs and went ahead and brought back in his whole diaper bag.

Then I tried to feed him his bottle (pumped breast milk) with one hand while pushing the cart with the other and looking at the shelves. I'd often look back at him and realize the bottle wasn't centered in his mouth, or even in his mouth anymore! Just dripping onto his onesie.

Then he wasn't into the bottle anymore. And the pacifier didn't work. And he wasn't content with his car seat. And holding him in twelve different positions didn't work. And he kept getting heavier.

I looked at the line to the pharmacy, looked at my screaming baby, and headed for the checkout line. Purchased my items as fast as possible, then sat in the back seat of my car trying to breast feed -- I assumed that the bottle hadn't been warm enough... I had tried to warm it in the car using the car vents, with the heater on, when driving to Longs!), giving Logan some colic medicine, and holding him again. He was inconsolable, with maybe a few times he stopped crying.

Husband called my cell, heard the screaming baby over it, and offered to take care of the rest of my chores, LOL! He picked up my meds at the pharmacy, and also took care of some of the groceries I was going to get at Vons.

Wow. This is just NOT easy, LOL! My respect for my own Mom keeps getting higher and higher!!!

Hubby was like, "why didn't you drop him off with your parents or my parents while you went grocery shopping?"

"I don't know... I thought it would be EASY!" :) Doh!!!

When I got home, I changed him, breast fed him, and he passed out, in his swing.

Ok, this motherhood thing isn't as easy as I had thought it would be. ;)

Ok, I didn't think it would be easy. But holy smokes! It's often way harder than I had thought.

Mommy's First Day Out Alone

7:15 am:
I am up. Feed baby, burp baby, change baby. Repeat.

8:30 am:
Husband takes shower. Continued feeding/burping/changing, tried to sleep. Heh.

8:45 am:
I take shower.

9:00 am:
Husband cleans and re-packs my c-section wound.

9:20 am:
Feed/water dogs while continuing to feed/burp baby.

10:00 am:
Prep baby bag, purse. Put on maternity bra and clean t-shirt. Feed/burp baby.

10:20 am:
Kick dogs outside. Dry hair. Cuddle fussy baby. Brush teeth. Put on pants.

10:35 am:
Change baby diaper. Logan poops onto the changing table. Manage to chase the runny, newborn, breast-fed poop such that it doesn't coat Logan or his t-shirt. Finish changing him, and sterilize changing table. Put on outside clothes. Re-run bottle sterilizer. Put nipple on bottle of breast milk that was stored in the refrigerator.

10:55 am:
Ignore baby's crying so can run to bathroom and have upset stomach.

11:05 am:
Carry baby (in car seat), baby bag, purse, jacket, and car seat base to car.

11:10 am:
Install car seat base in MY car. For first time. With less than 3 hours sleep. And empty stomach, as was fasting for a blood test. First try to put it behind driver's side because instructions don't say it's ok to put in the middle. Fight with it, curse hands (which still have barely any feeling/strength due to gestationally-induced carpal tunnel syndrome), curse back (which keeps spasming at the odd angles I'm leaning over at while in the back of the car), and finally get a clue. Install son-of-a-b*tch/fraking/piece-of-crap base in middle of back seat, realizing that just because I didn't see that the instructions said I could put it there didn't mean it wasn't allowed. Installed beautifully.

When I later described my fight with the car base, Husband had to add "So easy, even a sleep deprived new Mother can do it". :)

Car starts. Yea! Last person to drive it was Husband on December 4th, when he rescued it for me from one of my doctor's offices. [On December 3rd, I got walked over to the hospital from my doctor's office, and admitted to have induction started.]

I haven't driven a car since December 3rd. Just feeling the steering wheel in my hands again... Happy Sigh. I have my freedom back. :)

11:30 am:
Drive to clinic for BLOOD TEST, which I was FASTING for since midnight.

12:00 pm:
Get blood drawn.

12:15 pm:
Stand in line at clinic to ensure they had current insurance info.

12:25 pm:
Realized that people who would have let me cut ahead in line when I was 8+ months pregnant will NOT do me any favors while trying to carry 10+ pound baby in 5+ pound car seat, plus baby bag plus purse. Logan starts to cry... but is ok once we're driving again.

12:45 pm:
Scarfing McDonald's drive-through while sitting at bank. HUSBAND drives up and parks next to me!!! He saw me 5 cars ahead at McDonald's, and once he got his food, assumed I was headed for the bank, and tracked me down. And got to be very amused hearing about my adventures so far. :) Gave me hug, told me he was proud of me, LOL! Logan thankfully stays asleep.

1:10 pm:
I finish preparing checks for deposit. Drive car around to drive through... and the bloody bank has changed it's drive-thru ATM's. And in the process, has forgotten to fill up the cool new deposit envelope holder. Shit. Drive back around bank, and wake poor Logan up taking car seat out with me to walk-up ATM. Deposit 3 maternity leave checks that I've accumulated, as I haven't had a chance to deposit anything since before I was admitted to the hospital to be induced back on December 3rd.

1:20 pm:
Drive around for a while looking for where the phone store is. [Know it's near the bank.] Ahah! There it is! Oh, crap! Wrong cell provider. Logan's crying.

1:25 pm:
Park. Get into back seat. Try to cuddle Logan. No, he's probably hungry. Give him bottle. Shit! Can't give him cold breast milk, and have no way to warm it up in the car. But why can't you give baby's cold milk? Ok, nevermind... he only got a few swallows. Pull him back out of car seat, and pull out a boob, and start breast feeding.

1:30 pm:
Guy parked to my right walks back with his Subway Sandwiches lunch. And proceeds to eat it there in the car. Whenever I look at him, he's NOT looking at me. Still, I do my best to cover my boob!!!

1:45 pm:
Stop by work with Logan's birth certificate so HR can photocopy it and file it away as proof that I genuinely have a son that warranted adding a name to our insurance. Bring son in as well, LOL! [Talk about physical proof. Although I suppose I could have pulled down my pants and removed the bandage to show off the c-section scar, just so they could be sure.] Hear again how the 8 weeks for c-section + 6 weeks for bonding really is only allowed to total 12 weeks for maternity leave from the date of delivery. Which doesn't agree with what ObGyn said. So maybe I have until mid March, maybe I have until end of February. Still not sure.

Well, 2 weeks more or less... still have all of January and definitely most if not all of February.

Various co-workers get to see Logan and go ooh and aah. :)

Sigh. Logan starts crying again.

2:30 pm:
Arrive at other cell phone store. Purchase new phone to replace the dead one I got wet when I answered it twice in the hospital bathroom, with an ear wet from the shower. Pull Logan out of car seat and hold him when he starts crying again.

Yea! All my phone numbers were stored on the sim card, and it survived the wetting of the cell phone!

3:00 pm:
We're both home. Bring Logan inside, and all the crap from the car. Let dogs in. Clean off hospital germs. Run through bathroom. Remove Logan's outside clothes, change him. Crawl into recliner and feed Logan. Wonder how the hell people do this.

I'd intended to also visit my in-laws, and go grocery shopping. HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH!!!!!

Health update, and baby nicknames

My blood pressure is much better. The medication helped, but what really what seems to have made the biggest difference has been having my c-section incision cleaned and packed daily.

Hubby's theory is that my c-section wasn't draining properly, and that my blood pressure was high because my body was trying to get rid of the bad stuff by PUMPING it out.

For a while, had to go to ObGyn to get the wound packed daily. Was on call... meaning would get a phone call from the ObGyn sometime during the day asking us to come on down. No forewarning. Couldn't really plan our days ahead of time. Lovely.

[Before you think otherwise, I very much like my ObGyn. But so do 20 thousand other women! So it's a little hard to get in to see her in a scheduled fashion... especially when she's off doing emergency c-sections, etc.]

Then started having a nurse drop by daily. Received some forewarning ahead of time, which was good, because if they could at least give me an hour, I could take a shower before. And considering my attempts at keeping the wound dry while in the shower were failing miserably, the only intelligent options were to take a shower just before, pulling out the packing myself just before I hopped in the shower, or to STAY STINKY. Bleah.

Hubby was trained 2 days ago to clean and pack the wound. So now we can schedule things ourselves. Weee!!!

When he has to return to work, not sure if I should attempt to clean it myself or not. I keep flashing back to the movie Ronin, where Robert De Niro is looking at his gunshot wound with a mirror, and advising 2 other guys what to do to get the bullet out. You get the impression that De Niro's character has pulled the bullets out himself on occasion when he didn't have anyone else, and just had the tools and a mirror.

And really badly want to know when I can start driving again. My hubby having to take me to all these doctor appointments, and doing the grocery shopping, while he also has to go to work, is just not going to work well. He's already pretty damned wiped out. He's been on "vacation", but in spite of that, the last 2 days of very little sleep have made him nauseated. Consistently.

And it's not exactly been a wonderful vacation for him. He's been my slave. And I'm Logan's slave, of course!

Need to send hubby to Vegas with friends for a weekend. Badly.

I seem to be handling the sleeplessness a bit better. Maybe it's a motherhood thing, a switch getting thrown in my body to allow me to function. Not looking forward to when I have to go back to work on top of this no-sleep deal, LOL!!!

Sigh.

Baby has been given alot of nicknames thanks to our various experiences with him.

(1) "Little One"
(2) "Little Guy"
(3) "Logan Monster"
(4) "Ten-pound Tyrant"
(5) "Bottomless Pit"

1 and 2 are obvious. He's adorable. And he's little.

3... he can be a "monster". But we mean it affectionately. And it's mostly to accommodate the way we also talk to the dogs. Boss is "Boss Dog", or sometimes "B-Dog". Ellie is "Ellie Girl". Sometimes she's "Ellsibub", sorta like "Beelzebub", except there's nothing demonic about our Ellie Girl.

So Logan needs to be "Logan Monster". ;)

4... when he wants to be fed, he'd better be fed NOW. Even if he just wants another 5 minutes of food. It had better be now. "No, you may NOT take a bathroom break. No, you may not stop for a shower or to brush your teeth. What do you MEAN you need to eat and drink? NO, you must feed me NOW!!!!"

And when he pees, he wants that pee to leave his diaper NOW. But he also doesn't want his diaper changed. He wants the pee to miraculously leave his diaper. This whole changing thing is just way too inefficient for him.

Basically, it's pretty hard to please him!

5 has to do with how often he wants to be fed. And fed. And fed. Add to that the fact that he's not very, uhm, gentle with my nipples! And my hubby has started teasingly calling me a "moo cow".

Logan has made me realize that the perfect punishment for when he's old enough to do something wrong (and KNOW he's done something wrong) is to stick him in the corner and make him stand there... while wearing nipple-clamps. I keep threatening him with them whenever he makes me yip from pain.

He isn't getting anywhere near my poor nipples when his teeth start coming in. I am pumping WELL before we get there.

Thankfully, although he can be a tyrant, he's also really good at rewarding Mommy... even as he's making my poor nipples throb in pain. He makes this cooing noise that brings out emotions in me that I remember only having when holding and petting little puppies. Hubby calls it "mommy crack", i.e., crack-cocaine for mommies. It melts my heart. Which is good, because there are times that I've totally understood why someone might get frustrated enough to start shaking their baby!!!

I never realized babies could make positive noises. Thought it was all about screaming to high heaven at an ear-splitting frequency. But no, they actually make good noises, too. Oh, thank the Lord!!! :)

Anyway, in answer to my Sister-in-law's question from a few weeks ago, "no, we haven't killed him yet." :)

He's driving us crazy, but I still think Logan's a keeper. ;)

Don't break the baby...

We had our Sister and her boyfriend over at our house for Christmas. Logan isn't sleeping in his bedroom yet, so we shoved things around, and inflated a queen-sized blow-up bed in there. Infinitely more comfortable than the alternative: sleeping one person on my parent's ancient couch in the living room, the other on the floor. No door to close for privacy. No way to block out the light from the kitchen or the family room. Mom sleeping on the couch in the family room with a light on and the TV on, so...

Thought we were also sparing them the lovely beeping noises of the smoke detector that kept me up the 2 nights I slept on their couch in January, during the lovely termite-tenting of our house. But either the battery in the wall or in the smoke detector got replaced, or thankfully finally died. No beeping to be heard on Christmas Eve when we went over, LOL!

Anyway, my Sister and her boyfriend were arriving Sunday December 23rd, late in the evening. We took a look our baby, who hadn't had a bath yet. Who we had even been bad about just using a wet washcloth on his face. [His face was breaking out...] We'd been postponing a real bath until his umbilical cord fell off, but we'd even postponed just the "wash and dry a section at a time" version of baby bathing that we could have done in spite of the umbilical cord.

So, realizing we have a "welfare baby" appearance going on with our child, and knowing my Sister was on her way, we realized we needed to do more than just "feed the baby, change the baby, burp the baby, rock the baby". Needed to do more than just the bare minimum that appears to be sufficient to STOP THE CRYING.

We unpacked the baby bath kit. Hubby got the shower-attachment setup. [It's a battery-powered shower pump thingy that you dip one end into a water-holder. The water-holder has a temperature indicator so you know you're not about to freeze or boil the baby.]

The great hunt for the Johnson's Baby Shampoo failed miserably. [I had "hidden" it in the master-bath's shower.] So hair washing was to be done with the Johnson's Baby soap.

I put the baby bath kit into the guest bathroom tub. Filled the water reservoir. Watched the temperature indicator go up through "too cold" to "ideal", then crawl into "too hot". [Not the actual words on the indicator, but you get the idea.] Tossed some cold water in. There we go.

Removed baby clothing and diaper in other room, and brought baby in. Wiped Logan's face and ears and hands off with a wet washcloth first. Then wet his hair, washed that. Then wet rest of body and washed with a soapy washcloth. Then rinsed off. Wow. Baby is shivering. Wow. Really badly. Shit.

Hubby was watching, and we both realized that, as we'd been told, yes, babies have a hard time regulating body temperature! And washing/drying one section at a time was INDEED a better idea!

I picked Logan up and put him in a towel while hubby was taking care of something in the other room. Was in a hurry to dry baby. Baby is squirming like mad. While trying to get every part dry, realized his head was at a weird angle... shit, his head is hanging off the bathroom counter-top! Ack! Picked his head up and just grabbed him and the towel and headed for a better surface to finish drying him on.

Hubby meanwhile was hunting for onsies and socks, etc. We got him all suited up, covering every surface except his face. Hubby handed Logan to me, and I lay down and gave him all kinds of body-warmth, trying to counteract the hypothermia.

Phew!

We were wiped out. Apparently, so was Logan! He passed out and slept for HOURS after that trauma!!!

Eventually got him woken up to feed him. Then needed to change him. Hubby strapped him into his changing table as he's been getting more and more squirmy. I went over, took off the old diaper. Cleaned him. And then tried to lift him to put the new diaper under him. Hmmm... why can't I lift him higher? Shit! He's strapped down... I'm BENDING THE BABY IN HALF!!!!

Aigh!!!!!

Unstrapped the baby, finished putting the new diaper on him, and crawled back into bed with him.

I tried to break the baby. 3 times in one day. SHUDDER.

The next day, I was exhausted. Hubby had been telling me I wasn't resting enough. Mother-in-law was also like, "you're not resting enough." Sometime in the afternoon, I gave up, feeling guilty for apparently not taking good enough care of myself and feeling like I was getting punished for not feeling well, LOL. And crawled back into bed.

Well, this Christmas Eve, about 5 or 6 hours before we were going over to my parent's to celebrate. And of course, since it's Southern California, it was nice and cool in the bedroom this winter afternoon. NOT.

The afternoon sun hit. The room got up to mid to high 70's. And my post-partum body was having hot flashes. I'm trying to sleep, am keeping Logan close to myself so that he will sleep. Would wake up, and check his feet... his hands... his forehead. Was worrying now about heatstroke.

My Sister-in-law claims baby's are easier than dogs.

She's got to be on drugs. And she should be sharing.

Doctor, Doctor, give me the news...

So, Tuesday 12/11/2007 I went to see my ObGyn for some various concerns.

My c-section incision was oozing quite a bit. No fever though.

My back was hurting, and I almost felt like maybe I had a UTI (Urinary Trace Infection).

And most importantly, my blood pressure was through through the roof.

So, the nurse practitioner looked at my incision. It wasn't infected, and it's designed to heal from the innermost incision to the outermost. And they leave room so that any fluids that need to ooze out can ooze out. So, instead of the flimsy 4x4 inch squares of gauze, we were advised to use a pad to catch the fluids. So now I'm wearing 2 pads per pair of painties, in a kind of t-square formation... one to catch the "lochia", and one to catch the ooze.

The nurse also re-taped the incision. But the tape lasted as long as the tape lasted last time: about 2 hours! Told hubby not to re-tape it a 3rd time. Waste of effort. :)

Using my pregger SI-belt to hold 2nd pad in place over the incision.

Peed in a cup for the UTI test. Came back negative. Wee! And noticed something really cool: I could aim alot better now, LOL! W/O baby in the way in my belly, I actually could almost see what I was doing. :)

Blood pressure was still bad. Was told that, at next visit Thursday of next week, if it was still bad, would be sent to someone to look into getting treatment for high blood pressure.

My blood pressure during the tail end of the pregnancy kept going up. I guess I managed to get gestational high blood pressure. Theoretically, it will hopefully clear itself up a month from delivery, unless it's decided to become a problem for me in my non-pregger state.

So, went back home. A couple of days go by, and I feel short of breath. Call my ObGyn. I figure the shortness of breath is because my ObGyn had to practically sit on my tummy to push Logan down towards the c-section incision. [He was still way too far up... hadn't dropped down hardly at all. 42 weeks, and the kid had NO intention of leaving, LOL!]

ObGyn says that I need to go to the ER.

No!!!!!! Not the hospital AGAIN!!!! Sigh.

She also says to pick up another pain prescription from her office on the way. She had given me 2 refills on her original prescription, on a special prescription pad that allows for the scary pain meds to be prescribed with refills, but the pharmacy had still decided to limit it to one filling per prescription on the medication due to some law. But again, the prescription pad my ObGyn used should have taken care of that law as far as refills were concerned.

BTW, if I've got typo's galore here, please forgive me. Although my hips are feeling better, and I haven't had any real water retention or any heart burn to speak of, I STILL CAN'T FEEL MOST OF MY FINGERS. It's worse in my right hand. Sigh.

So, Thursday, 12/13/2007, we pack Logan into his car seat (for his 3rd car ride since his birth), and head off to first my ObGyn's, then the ER.

At the ER, they check my blood pressure, draw a bunch of blood, take my temp, ask me a bunch of questions, etc. I try to regurgitate all of my symptoms. It's hard when you aren't allowed to eat or drink anything because results from tests might send you in for surgery, LOL! Blood sugar was tanking. Thankfully, Logan slept through everything, and so never needed feeding.

They gave me a CT scan to check for blood clots. Didn't find anything. Ended up very happily being sent home after being given a blood pressure med to take right then, then another for the morning. Told to see ObGyn next day so she could either prescribe the same med, or something else.

Felt better, but tired.

Next morning, got up early 'cause wasn't sure when would see ObGyn. Called ObGyn, explained ER wanted me to see her today. Took shower. Fed/changed baby, ate stuff.

Got into ObGyn just before noon. Splitting headache. Blood pressure still pretty high. Showed ObGyn results. She talked to another doctor. Ended up with another prescription. Told to go back to ER if headache got worse or didn't go away. And to stay in bed for the next 4 days, except for Logan's doc appointment Monday. And to come in again on Tuesday.

Hubby took me and Logan home, then went back out with grocery list I'd given him and prescriptions to fill.

I pretty much slept most of 12/14/2007 away, except for feeding/changing Logan. I was running from that headache. Around 7 or 9pm, woke up and the bloody thing was finally GONE. Thank you, Lord!!!

So, have been waited on hand and feet.

During the whole ER experience, was worried about what parents were going to think.

While I was in the hospital having 2 days of unsuccessful inducement, they flashed back to when I was a sick little kid, and they'd take me to the hospital once a year for a week at a time, to have the doctor's check on me and see how I was surviving. [Doc's thought I had a genetic disease that either God healed me of, or God decided I didn't have, LOL! I may in fact have just been sickly due to being born puny, 6 weeks premature, and never getting breast fed. Latter was not my Mom's fault, however.]

So, they are flashing back to when they were feeling helpless to help me. Mom's got congestive heart failure, and is nearly 80. Dad's nearly 86. If some stress takes Mom out, Dad is likely to follow from losing Mom.

Have been trying to keep them from seeing me in pain. Didn't think they could handle it. Didn't want the delivery to be the death of them!!!

So there I was, in the ER. Hoping that they weren't worrying too much about me.

I was stressed out. I wasn't doing "calm blue ocean" very well right then. But I've been trying to learn how to maintain the calm blue ocean thing.

Like, when I was in the hospital earlier for the inducement/c-section, I really didn't have the luxury to feel sorry for myself that I was getting poked with twelve billion needles. Remembering how I used to be terrified of needles, and how that was caused by being traumatized as a little kid, wasn't going to be productive towards my surviving delivery. Honestly, instead, I've been enjoying how I'm no LONGER terrified of needles.

I'm still a bit spooked by hospitals, but I was also enjoying the fact that I trusted that everyone there was on my side, and had no intention of hurting me, or allowing me to be in pain if they could help it.

I guess you could say that I was enjoying having a positive hospital experience rather than allowing self-pity to come into play about how I was justified in being scared or angry at having to suffer through the hospital again in my life.

I'd like to take credit for my more positive attitude, but I figure it's God, plus hubby's training, plus Zoloft and alot of kind people drawing my blood that have turned thing around for me, LOL! Ok, that and the birthing classes making me ready for what to expect. :)

Anyway, I've been trying to not react to crisis's with panic, but rather with calm blue ocean attitude. Whether the crisis is my own or someone else's. Not always doing it well. But have seen some improvement.

And ironically, I want my parents to do the same. Sigh. They understandably responded with, "well, now that you have your own child, you understand how we can still worry about you". They sorta missed the point, LOL! Because of their health, they can't really indulge that worry. They can be concerned, but it needs to be calm concern. 'Cause I want them to be around for a few more Christmases, damnit!!! :)

Anyway, things have been very weird. But thank God, Logan's health has appeared to be really good. Would rather I be the sickly one than him, anyday. :)

Now if me and hubby could just catch up on our REM sleep...

Communication Skills

So, my Sister called at 9:30am to make sure we wouldn't open some boxes she was sending for Logan until Xmas. Now, we're using the time from, uhm, sunrise to noon in order to catch up on our REM sleep due to feeding/changing Logan all night long. So the phone ringing in the bedroom meant we were scrambling to answer it before the ringing could wake Logan up.

After I talked to my Sister, hubby got up to turn the heat on as he thought it was too cold for Logan. Then he came back into the bedroom.

Me: "Love, could you turn the phone off?"

Hubby: "You want me to turn off the fan?"

"Yes, it's going to wake Logan."

"Ok......"

I put my head back on the pillow. Hubby turns off the FAN. I look up at the sudden lack of white noise.

Me: "Why did you turn the FAN off?"

Hubby: "You told me to..."

"No, the phone!!! The phone!" :)

We were both so tired, we both got the exhaustion giggles. :)

Home Safe

I'm behind several updates.

Logan was born December 5th at 3:10pm via C-section, after 2 days of unsuccessful induction attempts using 3 different medications.

Wee!!!

He was 8 pounds 3 ounces, 20 inches long. Due to the fact that they had given me morphine to help me cope with the long, unsuccessful inducement (went from 1 centimeter to a full 1.5 centimeters, whoo-hoo! :) ), he was born pretty danged sleepy.

Husband watched procedure. I was thankfully kept unaware via a blue sheet. When they broke my water through the incision, it reminded hubby of the water fountain at the Bellagio, LOL! He said first it squirted up 3 feet. He's since said it was 4. I think it's getting higher each time he tries to remember the scene.

He got to see my abdominal cavity. I'm glad I didn't see anything during the procedure, but I almost wish we'd recorded it so I could watch it once, then burn the evidence, LOL!

Several days in the hospital later, with lots of education and emotional / physical support from the nurses/doctors, they released us from the hospital on Sunday December 9th. That was way more of a production that I had thought it would be. And then, getting home, and letting the dogs sniff me and make sure I was ok (after I'd been gone since Monday morning almost a week ago) was also a production.

Then Logan wanted to be fed, changed, etc. Dogs got kicked out, w/o getting to meet him for a while. They about went nuts.

And my blood pressure had been running high. And then I realized my pain meds were wearing off, which might account at that moment for the feeling that my blood pressure was through the roof. And since they'd removed the staples Saturday, my incision was bleeding. Weee... just alot of stress even at home.

Hubby called his parents in to babysit me and Logan while he went to get pain meds at the pharmacy, as well as gauze to put over my incision. Before he left, though, he fed me and called the hospital and various doctors.

Basically, he had to take care of an invalid AND a baby. Well, I was doing the breast feeding, LOL!

His parents came over and talked to me and kept me company while he picked up my meds.

His parents came over later that evening also for moral support, LOL!

Saturday night, in the hospital, I finally lost it. Too much stimulation/information, too little sleep. Nurses had to pull me off the walls. Had a good serious crying fit. And then I finally had gotten those damned post-partum hormones weeped out, and I was SO much better. Sigh.

Hubby has been awesome. He's taken over on scheduling doc appointments, on feeding me, on chores, etc. I think we're going to make it, but it is a pretty stressful experience, LOL!

Worth it, though. :)

Finally figured out how to wake Logan for his feeding sessions. Cold, wet feet. Diaper wipes work great for that. Now if we can figure out how to get him to calm down and go back to sleep! :)

And my milk finally came in. And with that, Logan has been voracious!!!

Ok, got to click submit before he starts crying again, LOL!

Oh, the dogs finally met him. They keep checking him when he cries. I can't help but think they want to give me advice: "what are you doing? No, do it like this!!!"

12/4/2007, 10:45pm. I. WANT. CHOCOLATE.

Ok, pain's getting worse, and kindof hanging on in a low-level way.

I want fentonal. And Reesus peanut-butter cups. And a Wendy's cheeseburger. And a LARGE order of salty, oily french fries.

Starting to get some slight cold sweats.

Chocolate ice cream would be good too. And chocolate milk shakes. And chocolate sodas. Oooooh... and about 3 coca colas. And some mac and cheese.

Why do I feel voracious???

12/4/2007 9pm Still being induced.

Well, 2 doses of something to soften the cervix have left it a little softer, but still at 1 cm. Or at least, at noon today, it was still 1cm.

Now on picotin (spelling?!?!?) to induce contractions and also open up the cervix. Started that around noon today. Have had some contractions... was almost getting repetitive, with ones every 6 minutes. But not quite happening right now.

They were ironically really low on the pain scale. Freaking me out. Was expecting to be pretty much speaking in blasphemous tongues, spinning my head 360 degrees around, and projectile vomiting green bile at this point, LOL! [And that's as much of the movie The Exorcist as I can even remotely stand to remember, LOL!] But they have been really nice and easy. It makes me feel like they are just making me a little too relaxed so they can jump me later! :)

But this is what IS hurting: the kid is trying to DIG his way out, I SWEAR!!! I keep looking down and going, "Ouch! Hey, cut it out! Let my cervix open up first!"

2 weeks being cooked extra... the little bugger has got nails, I know it. And he's definitely SCRATCHING. Yikes. OUCH.

They keep upping the picotin dosage every hour or so. And they will check my cervix at midnight, and if it's still closed, will give me some medication to open it up, while still keeping me on the picotin.

So, still preggers. And have a picotin drip and saline drip attached. And the baby monitor cables. Weeee.

Hubby setup an ad-hoc network that I can reach through his computer. His computer is hooked up to the internet via his phone. So as long as he's here, I have network access. Yea!!!! :) But don't count on it. Things may change.

It was funny, because he was asking me, "are you trying to access bleah"? Uh, no, I was trying to access something else... So then he password-protected his ad-hoc network, and we both started laughing as we realized the people out there who had briefly had Internet-Love, and were now DENIED, LOL!!!

Thank you all of you for all your words of encouragement. :) Can't believe all the VERY COOL friends I've made online. :) You guys ROCK. :)

12/3/2007 In the hospital

This morning, the doctor determined my water was a little low. So I was walked over to the hospital.

I looked at the nurse pathetically and asked if I could go home first and grab my bags, etc., LOL! Nope. Husband had to rescue my car. And bring my bags. I think there's a part of me that wanted to just go home and hide, and maybe they wouldn't drag me to the hospital until the original induction date of December 5th, LOL!

They've given me stuff to dilate my cervix. I'm here until Logan comes out. Been here since 10am-ish. Seen both sets of grandparents.

I won't often have internet access. There is no wi-fi... using husband's laptop to type this, and his laptop is using his cell phone for internet access. So my laptop is just going to be for playing movies.

I feel weirdly disconnected, LOL! I need my internet fix, damnit!

Anyway, whenever I'm able, will keep you guys informed. :)

I may be here a LONG while. Sigh.

Still preggers 12/2/2007 1:30pm, plus spooked myself

I am now officially... uhm... 11 days late. And I recently (within the last week) learned that mortality rates for babies suddenly go up past 42 weeks. [I'm being induced at the 42 week mark if he hasn't come out before then.]

So, I sleep in all kinds of weird patterns. I slept from 8:30pm to midnight, got up, was up until 5am, came to bed. Around 5:30am Logan stopped running laps. I was lying on my right side, which sometimes feels a little funny, like maybe that was where the cord is hooked up. Sometimes I've felt my heart start working harder, like maybe Logan is squishing the cord on that side.

So, Logan was running laps. Then suddenly he just stops. Like he's done, he can sleep now. But my first thought was "he ran out of oxygen, he's going to be stillborn!"

I started patting my belly. Then kindof moving my belly around. Then moved to my left side to get him "off the cord", assuming he was on it. Then majorly thumping my belly, poking my belly, shaking my belly around. Kid wouldn't move.

Logan was probably in there, lying there quietly, going, "WTF??? I'm trying to sleep here... what the hell is she doing?!?" Husband woke up to me patting belly and then stopping and waiting quietly to feel something. I sent him out to the garage for the stethoscope*. He came back once w/o finding it, went back out when I told him where I thought it was. By that time, Logan had started squirming, because I'd given up on poking and prodding, and now Logan was all like giving me his thoughts on waking him up, LOL!

Tried to find the heartbeat using the stethoscope. But couldn't find his heartbeat. And learned that getting frustrated and slapping the stethoscope onto the next location of my stomach (in my search pattern) was kindof jarring on my ears, LOL!

But he was moving around, and all peeved at me for waking him up. So it was all good. Went to sleep. ;)

* The stethoscope was in the garage because, of course, that's where everyone stores it, right??!? :)

So, a friend gave us her gun safe several months ago, and we stored the huge thing in the garage. She couldn't remember the combination, but was pretty sure she knew the first and last numbers. We tried to break into it, and had no luck after a LONG time of trying. We wanted to (a) be able to use it, and (b) return her guns!!! The gun safe was never registered when it was purchased, so there was no-one to call for the combo!!! Friend eventually came to stay for a few days, and tried to break into it herself. We also tried to get someone to come out and break into it for us, but w/o proof of ownership, for some reason (LOL), they balked!

There was a little ID code on a piece of metalic paper that was stuck to the safe, but the metalic paper got majorly munged when the safe was moved, so couldn't even use that to ID the safe!!!!

Safe was moved to our friend's house on Friday. She can now sit there in her garage, trying to crack it open in her copious free time, LOL!

This whole event made my husband post something on his blog about how a free safe is never free, LOL!!! I think I did the same... have to find the links, but whatever... :)

Anyway, Logan is fine. I've been pretty good about not having pregger panic, but I guess the whole idea that I really COULD over-bake Logan is starting to work on my brain. :)

Still preggers 12/1/2007 7am, plus Vader PEZ Dispensers

My friend Radioactive Jam found the scavenger item I suggested, a Darth Vader PEZ Dispenser. I honestly wasn't sure one existed, but I figured if Snoopy PEZ dispensers existed (they do... I own one... uhm... somewhere around here... guess I should post a picture), then surely a Vader PEZ dispenser also exists. ;)

I'm embarrassed to say that I only just realized he'd found my suggested item. I.E., he found it almost a week ago, but thanks to this whole pregnancy thing, I've been rather oblivious, LOL!

I'm currently up right now, having risen a little after 4:30am after a bout of pregger heartburn, followed by the ever-present pregger need-to-pee, followed also then by the need to have several sneezing fits in an attempt to clear my sinuses of all the phlegm that my pregger body likes to accumulate when I sleep.

Basically, I'm a sneezing, peeing, burning monster, but thankfully I have chocolate (in the form of miniature Reesus Peanut Butter Cups), so I haven't killed anyone yet. ;)

People keep telling me that it's all going to be ok, that Logan will arrive soon. Although there are many aspects of pregnancy that I'm really done experiencing, I realize I'm not actually in any extreme hurry to end this whole thing. I've enjoyed the extra time to rest and nest and prepare. I don't want to over-bake the kid, but I haven't been in a hurry to rush to the hospital and do the deed.

And a part of me -- a very small, weird part -- will actually miss being pregnant. It's a truly bizarre but amazing experience.

This does NOT mean I'm already ready to start working on kid #2, LOL! Once I get my body back, it will probably take alot to talk me into doing this a 2nd time. ;)

So, did have some signs last night that the kid is thinking of packing up his stuff and exiting prior to the eviction date of December 5th. I wasn't feeling so hot yesterday evening... or rather, I was feeling pretty cold. Having the heater on, the fire going, and blankets didn't seem to help right away. And I sorta felt like I was having cramps, but mostly I just felt really tired, and like my tummy was in solid-basketball-mode. Lay down for a bit, got warmed up, then managed to get back up to go out and continue seeing the PS3 demo hubby's friend was giving us. :)

I think I must have overdone things yesterday morning, with the doc appointment and then the grocery shopping, and insisting on not having help with putting the groceries in the car. [But then, bringing on labor from dropping 24-packs of water into the trunk would NOT be a bad thing at this point.] Am feeling much better at the moment. Maybe I should go lift some more 24-packs. ;)

So the PS3 demo: got to see a ton of hubby's friend's games. Included were:

• Heavenly Sword


• Warhawk


• Ratchet and Clank


• Folklore


• MotorStorm


• Resistance: Fall of Man


• Assassins Creed

I'm not sure which one floats my boat best. They were all VERY VERY PRETTY. :) Resistance felt a bit like Halo 3. Warhawk felt like Halo 3 online, LOL! You definitely use alot of the same skills.

I do know I'm still totally jonesing for Grand Theft Auto 4 when it comes out. We don't own a PS3 yet, but it will be out for the XBox 360, so that's ok. But then again, some of the games in the above list were nifty enough to warrant the purchase of a PS3, so... Heh. Maybe our old PS2 can go into the baby's room for playing DVDs and my old Spyro 2 game. ;)

Of course, hubby's friend has already been heavily exposed at our house to Guitar Hero for the XBox 360. ;) Not sure if hubby's friend has seen Halo 3 yet for the XBox 360, although he's played 1 and 2. Hubby wants to borrow 1 and 2 to play the back-story, since he's already finished Halo 3. Well, almost: he finished Halo 3 in normal mode, and now has been fighting it in Legendary mode. But he's lost a bit of his impetus, thanks in part to the purchase of Guitar Hero, and the fact that he's "Flooded out" right now, LOL. [If you play Halo 3, you know what I mean by being Flooded out. ;) ]

I've played a little Halo 3, mostly alongside hubby, and mostly trying to be the reason hubby can re-spawn. If you play in 2 player mode, as long as one of you is alive, you can continue the round w/o restarting from the last checkpoint. When one person dies, if the other is still alive, the dead person re-spawns and play can continue. This assumes the other person is any good at staying alive... I'm not, LOL!

I've also enjoyed Guitar Hero... and would be playing MORE of it, if I hadn't lost feeling in my right hand's fingers thanks to being pregnant. Strumming the guitar just isn't really comfortable. I'm just glad I can still type reasonably well in spite of it. [At least I'm no longer retaining water in my right ankle... pregnancy side-effects are SO weird.]

My hands both feel sore and tight when I try to close them into fists. Freaking weird.

Yeah, ok. I'm ready for the kid to be born, LOL!

The left hip feeling like it's rubbing bone-against-bone... I could deal with that. I miss walking the dogs, and hobbling around gets a little old, but whatever. Water retention... in only my right ankle? Weird, but could cope. I could mostly deal with my sinuses going from their normal crappy state to the uber-crappy pregnant state. The heartburn... mostly controllable with Zantac and/or Tums and some swearing, so... cool. The peeing when there's barely any pee to pee ("Why does it say 'paper jam' when there is no paper jam?!?"), ok, can deal with that. The kid running laps in my belly... ok, sure. The kid trying to feng shui my organs around... rather uncomfortable, but he doesn't do it ALL the time. Being required to drink a TON of water in spite of the fact that I have a bladder being squished by this kid down to the size of a... hmmm... PEZ dispenser... ok, sure. Seeing doctor's more times in a year than I can shake a stick at: ok, whatever. [The Phlebotomy and Endocrinology departments in one clinic have insisted I bring the kid around after he's born!!!] The back hurting if I try to do dishes... sure, whatever, no biggy.

But my hands cramping up? Losing feeling in most of my fingers of my right hand? Ok, I'm done here, LOL!

Phew. Well, it's almost 7:00 am. My nose has shut up. I think the heart burn is finally done with me. And it's about time to pee again, LOL. Maybe I can pee and then go back to sleep. :)

Good night all.

Oh, forgot. Hubby's friend thinks I'll go into labor on Sunday. I've had several different labor-date predictions from online and real-life friends. Not holding my breath, LOL! But then, hubby's friend has made other "predictions" before that have been correct.

Hubby's friend doesn't have ESP or anything... he's just really good at seeing where things are going, LOL!

So maybe he's right, and I'd better crank the nesting into high-gear today (Saturday) as this might be the last day of pregnancy, LOL!

... but think I'll do that AFTER some more sleep. ;)