And a merry (and very tiring) time was had by all. :)
So, quick recap of my Christmas Vacation so far:
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December 24th, Sunday, Christmas Eve:
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My sister C, her boyfriend B, and her boyfriend's 16 year old dog Sheila arrive in the morning.
We 4 humans and 3 dogs (we have 2 German Shepherds, Boss and Ellie) go for a walk around a nearby "lake". [It's pretty small by lake standards.] Sheila has to be carried part of the trip. [Thankfully, the 70 lb. and 100 lb. dogs did not require carrying.]
We missed the 4pm Church Service we'd intended to go to. We got back late from the walk, and my sister didn't want to be rushed on Christmas Eve. The dinner was at a restaurant downtown at 5:30pm... I should have probably made it a little later but I was focused more on keeping it early.
My dad was a bit disappointed, but I didn't learn this until later. My dad is 83, my mom's 77... the family attending Church on Christmas Eve is pretty important to him. With my parent's increasing age, the odds are decreasing as far as us being able to do that the following year. Actually, I'm disappointed we didn't go, as well. My Church attendance sucks, and I was hoping on at least making it to Christmas Eve service.
So, we got cleaned up and picked up my parents for dinner at Chef Karim's. Karim made a point of having the restaurant open Christmas Eve for me and my husband, and a bunch of other regulars. So, when I learned the earliest time we could get a table was 5:30pm, I picked it hoping to allow Karim and his employees to get out of there as early as possible and go relax for the rest of Christmas Eve.
Chef Karim's serves Moroccan food. It's... incredible.
My husband's parents and his aunt also came for dinner there. We had a blast. My sister's boyfriend and I both got up and danced with the belly dancer. :) Karim brought over 3 bottles of Amazir, a wonderful Moroccan wine, and we drank to our heart's content. We always have a spare glass on the table for Karim, and keep it filled. [A tipsy chef is a REALLY GOOD CHEF. ;) ]
Then we all went to our house to open presents. My husband's parents stopped by my husband's brother's house on the way over, and also dropped off my husband's aunt at their own house: she was tired. My husband's aunt is recovering from having a pacemaker put in, and has congestive heart failure. My mom also has a pacemaker and is on meds for congestive heart failure, so I know what that's all about.
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December 25th, Monday, Christmas Day:
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My sister, her boyfriend, my husband and myself took our two dogs to the beach and went hunting for seashells. Sheila stayed home... it would have been too much for her.
Then we went over to my parents house for pizza, and to watch football. Well, my husband and I aren't into football, but he watched a little anyway while I sat on the couch and watched the latest episode of Battlestar Galactica that I'd downloaded to my iBook, but had been unable to watch until then.
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December 26th, Tuesday:
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My sister, her boyfriend, my husband and I got down to the harbor at 8am. We purchased boat tickets, fishing licenses, weights and hooks. We rented fishing gear. I picked up a disposable camera. And we left harbor at 9am to go fishing in the ocean. :)
They stopped on the way out of the harbor to pick up a bunch of live bait they had in a container there. It was sardines... and maybe anchovies? They also had sliced-up squid to use as bait if you didn't want to use live bait.
We tried a few different locations, but w/o much luck. A few fish were caught, but... We ended up moving around alot until we found the ideal spot. And then the fish just seemed to jump into the boat.
In order to use the live bait, you have to stick your hand into a shallow tank and scoop out a sardine. They are not happy about being caught, and will squiggle out of your grasp. There were quite a few people bent over chasing after escapee sardines that were flopping around on the boat. I started to get really good about catching them and holding onto them.
In order to hook them, you had to push the hook through a spot in front of their eyes and behind this piece of cartilage in their nose. Then you got it into the water, and hoped it wouldn't wiggle off. We didn't use floaters, so you allowed the weight on the line to pull the fish all the way to the bottom.
I lost 2 weights and 2 hooks to rocks. :P And we had a few incidents of cormorants (a type of bird that dives for fish) getting hooked when they stupidly (and repeatedly) went after the sardines! The crew of the boat was expert at getting the hooks out of their bills, so... It was kinda funny... after they unhooked the bird, they would shake it around a little to disorient it and then toss it back in the water. The bird would kindof look around, with an expression on it's face that said "whoa...". :) And hopefully it would decide that going after sardines with metal hooks attached was a BAD idea.
I have OCD. But I wasn't having any problems catching the squirmy slimy sardines, hooking them up, and then rubbing the fish scales off my hands. My husband couldn't stand the slimy-ness, and so was mostly using the cut up pieces of squid. I put 1 or 2 sardines on his hook for him. :)
We ended up catching almost 20 fish among the 4 of us. We had a very cool fish dinner that evening. Some of the fish was given to a friend of my husband's, who made some very tasty ceviche with it.
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December 27th, Wednesday:
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My sister and her boyfriend (and his dog) left for home. And we pretty much collapsed.
Nothing much else happened over the holiday. We stayed home for New Years Eve to make sure the dogs were ok. [The fireworks some of our neighbors set off did stress them out a bit. You know you're 100 lb. German Shepherd is stressed when he tries to climb onto the couch behind your husband to hide!]
So, how was the holidays for all of you?
This reminds me. We still have HALLOWEEN pictures left to put up. Yikes.
I'm such a procrastinator. :P
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Friday, December 22, 2006
Christmas Time Is Here
It's that time of year.
My Sister and her boyfriend, and her boyfriend's 16 year old dog, are coming to stay for a few days.
We plan on going to an early Christmas Eve service, then out for Moroccan food, then back to our house to unwrap presents. All 9 of us: me, my husband, my parents, my husband's parents, my husband's Aunt, my Sister, and my Sister's boyfriend.
Not sure if we'll do anything else on Christmas Eve... maybe in the morning my husband, myself, my sister and her boyfriend and maybe my Dad will go see the Natural History Museum. My Mom's not very good at walking long distances anymore: congestive heart failure. Also, she's 77. So she's not coming. Dad's technically not too good at walking long distances either... he is 83! But he's still in pretty good shape... so we'll just walk slowly.
Then Christmas Day, the only thing open is a Railroad museum. Ditto: same 5 people: me, my husband, my Sister, her boyfriend, my Dad... uhm, assuming my husband is up for it, of course. :) Or my Dad is up for it. Or if any of us are up for it by then.
And then on Tuesday, the 26th, we go fishing in the ocean from 9am to 3pm, off of a boat. Me, my husband, my Sister and her boyfriend. [Dad has to work. Yes. He's 83 and he has to work. :P Don't ask. But at least it keeps him going...]
Then Wednesday, my Sister and her boyfriend are out of here, and we collapse into a small puddle on the living room floor, with our 2 German Shepherds standing guard. ;)
Maybe Wednesday morning I should put a "Do Not Disturb: Christmas Vacation Detox in Progress" sign on the door. With something extra like "Trespassers will be Bitten by Dogs that May or May Not be Rabid." And then we can tie some frothy cotton on our dog's muzzles to make it look like they are frothing at the mouth. [And before you ask, their rabies shots are up to date.]
Yeah. I like that idea. ;)
My Mormon friend, Kenya Starflight, was very sweet and sent us Christmas gifts. I've never received Christmas Gifts from a person I only know online before! This is rather neat. ;) I sent her something as well.
We've exchanged photo's, so she knows what I look like. Uhm, on a GOOD day, anyway, LOL!!! And we've been pretty good about emailing each other really often, so I really feel like we know each other. Hope we can meet in person one day. She's very cool.
The shopping is 99.999% done. I may go get something for a friend's daughter. I already got stuff for another friend's daughter, but I haven't seen the first mentioned daughter in a long time... so am feeling disconnected, and in the great scheme of things, only thought of it recently when in contact with her Mom. Sigh. I feel like the shopping and the wrapping will never ever really be done... maybe I should just leave everything unwrapped under the tree, and throw a big blanket over it all to hide it. ;)
The tree... heh. It's plastic. And still in the box. I need to put it together before I can even decorate it. This is the first year I've condescended to purchase a plastic tree.
Let's just say this year has been a little hectic, and somehow I've done an incredibly good job of procrastinating. :)
Like the lights outside... they only went up this past Tuesday evening. And only on the long bush that is next to the walkway leading up to our front door. I called it a "rapid deployment of Christmas lights". It actually turned out pretty good, for 15 minutes of feverish untangling and arranging.
And no short female computer programmers had to get up on any nasty scary ladders to hang Christmas Lights from the roof. ;)
Oh, crap. I went shopping, and I forgot to get seasickness meds for Tuesday. :P Well, maybe tomorrow. Or maybe I'll just barf. I've gone scuba diving, ocean-kayaking, flying, etc. But put me on a boat and try to cross the Channel to the islands here and it's seasick-city for me. Well, maybe it won't be too bad... we're not going all the way out to the islands to fish... just 8 miles out.
Oof. And the tree... it's not exactly going to smell like pine. [Should have picked up some pine scented spray.]
Wait, did this just change from a report on my Christmas to an online Christmas to-do list? ;)
Anyway, in all the insanity this time of year, I don't want to forget the Reason for the Season. Even though Jesus was probably born in the summer, this is the time of year we celebrate His birth. It's not about presents, it's not about holiday decorations, or holiday food, or egg nog. Or mistletoe and making our dogs wear fake antlers while we take pictures of them. ;)
It's about the gift of salvation through God's only begotten Son, Jesus Christ.
I may be, in my opinion, a really flaky Christian. But that's not going to change my knowing the real reason for Christmas.
So, to quote my favorite Christmas passage, one that Linus quoted so well in "A Charlie Brown Christmas", here is Luke chapter 2, in the Old King James. [It somehow sounds best in the Old King James.]
Luke chapter 2:
[1] And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed.
[2] (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)
[3] And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.
[4] And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)
[5] To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
[6] And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
[7] And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
[8] And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
[9] And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
[10] And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
[11] For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
[12] And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
[13] And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
[14] Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
Merry Christmas, everyone. :)
My Sister and her boyfriend, and her boyfriend's 16 year old dog, are coming to stay for a few days.
We plan on going to an early Christmas Eve service, then out for Moroccan food, then back to our house to unwrap presents. All 9 of us: me, my husband, my parents, my husband's parents, my husband's Aunt, my Sister, and my Sister's boyfriend.
Not sure if we'll do anything else on Christmas Eve... maybe in the morning my husband, myself, my sister and her boyfriend and maybe my Dad will go see the Natural History Museum. My Mom's not very good at walking long distances anymore: congestive heart failure. Also, she's 77. So she's not coming. Dad's technically not too good at walking long distances either... he is 83! But he's still in pretty good shape... so we'll just walk slowly.
Then Christmas Day, the only thing open is a Railroad museum. Ditto: same 5 people: me, my husband, my Sister, her boyfriend, my Dad... uhm, assuming my husband is up for it, of course. :) Or my Dad is up for it. Or if any of us are up for it by then.
And then on Tuesday, the 26th, we go fishing in the ocean from 9am to 3pm, off of a boat. Me, my husband, my Sister and her boyfriend. [Dad has to work. Yes. He's 83 and he has to work. :P Don't ask. But at least it keeps him going...]
Then Wednesday, my Sister and her boyfriend are out of here, and we collapse into a small puddle on the living room floor, with our 2 German Shepherds standing guard. ;)
Maybe Wednesday morning I should put a "Do Not Disturb: Christmas Vacation Detox in Progress" sign on the door. With something extra like "Trespassers will be Bitten by Dogs that May or May Not be Rabid." And then we can tie some frothy cotton on our dog's muzzles to make it look like they are frothing at the mouth. [And before you ask, their rabies shots are up to date.]
Yeah. I like that idea. ;)
My Mormon friend, Kenya Starflight, was very sweet and sent us Christmas gifts. I've never received Christmas Gifts from a person I only know online before! This is rather neat. ;) I sent her something as well.
We've exchanged photo's, so she knows what I look like. Uhm, on a GOOD day, anyway, LOL!!! And we've been pretty good about emailing each other really often, so I really feel like we know each other. Hope we can meet in person one day. She's very cool.
The shopping is 99.999% done. I may go get something for a friend's daughter. I already got stuff for another friend's daughter, but I haven't seen the first mentioned daughter in a long time... so am feeling disconnected, and in the great scheme of things, only thought of it recently when in contact with her Mom. Sigh. I feel like the shopping and the wrapping will never ever really be done... maybe I should just leave everything unwrapped under the tree, and throw a big blanket over it all to hide it. ;)
The tree... heh. It's plastic. And still in the box. I need to put it together before I can even decorate it. This is the first year I've condescended to purchase a plastic tree.
Let's just say this year has been a little hectic, and somehow I've done an incredibly good job of procrastinating. :)
Like the lights outside... they only went up this past Tuesday evening. And only on the long bush that is next to the walkway leading up to our front door. I called it a "rapid deployment of Christmas lights". It actually turned out pretty good, for 15 minutes of feverish untangling and arranging.
And no short female computer programmers had to get up on any nasty scary ladders to hang Christmas Lights from the roof. ;)
Oh, crap. I went shopping, and I forgot to get seasickness meds for Tuesday. :P Well, maybe tomorrow. Or maybe I'll just barf. I've gone scuba diving, ocean-kayaking, flying, etc. But put me on a boat and try to cross the Channel to the islands here and it's seasick-city for me. Well, maybe it won't be too bad... we're not going all the way out to the islands to fish... just 8 miles out.
Oof. And the tree... it's not exactly going to smell like pine. [Should have picked up some pine scented spray.]
Wait, did this just change from a report on my Christmas to an online Christmas to-do list? ;)
Anyway, in all the insanity this time of year, I don't want to forget the Reason for the Season. Even though Jesus was probably born in the summer, this is the time of year we celebrate His birth. It's not about presents, it's not about holiday decorations, or holiday food, or egg nog. Or mistletoe and making our dogs wear fake antlers while we take pictures of them. ;)
It's about the gift of salvation through God's only begotten Son, Jesus Christ.
I may be, in my opinion, a really flaky Christian. But that's not going to change my knowing the real reason for Christmas.
So, to quote my favorite Christmas passage, one that Linus quoted so well in "A Charlie Brown Christmas", here is Luke chapter 2, in the Old King James. [It somehow sounds best in the Old King James.]
Luke chapter 2:
[1] And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed.
[2] (And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)
[3] And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.
[4] And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)
[5] To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
[6] And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
[7] And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
[8] And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
[9] And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
[10] And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
[11] For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
[12] And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
[13] And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
[14] Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
Merry Christmas, everyone. :)
Saturday, November 11, 2006
The Mouse, he left our house
"The Mouse, he left our house.
No Mouse today, he's gone away.
To ease the pain, he's down the drain!"
Well, ok, he's not. And btw, if you can identify the above quote, I'll give you free dead mice in the mail.
Anyway, I'm sick. I caught the flu. It moved from my throat to my sinuses to my bronchial tubes. I did the fever thing. Now I'm doing the bronchial cough/exhaustion thing.
And my husband is sick. Because it wasn't enough for it to go through my body, it had to leap to his body too.
I stayed home from work this week. My husband had to fly up north and work, and sleep in a hotel room every night. :P He realized he had it about midway in his first workday up north. He's now home, after 5 hellish days for him, and very happily glued to the couch.
We have 2 big German Shepherds. Do they scare rodents away? Hell no. Do they care if we have a rodent? Not even. Do they help with killing rodents? Nope.
They have a strong prey drive. But nothing of that came out to help in this instance.
So this past Wednesday, I'm home sick, right? Coughing up a lung. And I open the doors to the cabinets to find something to eat. Hoping there's some soup I didn't realize was down there. Oooh. Look at all the little poo-like objects down there. Uh-huh.
I pulled out 2 mouse traps, and set them both. This was a major challenge for me because mouse traps scare me. Well, loud sudden noises scare me. It took me a while to get used to gunfire when my Dad taught me how to fire a gun. Little kids running around with balloons is like torture, because I know eventually they are going to pop something.
But I was sick. And something about feeling like crap made setting traps not a big deal. Just bloody had to be done.
I dropped one on the floor to hear it snap, to desensitize me. Then I proceeded to mess up and snap it on my fingers. Twice. Well, I was pretty damned well desensitized by it by then, LOL! I placed two traps Wednesday afternoon, and by Wednesday evening, we have the following:
And my first response, instead of "what a filthy, disgusting, disease ridden creature", was "oh, that poor cute little thing... and it's in pain..." Yeah, I know. I've lost it. But take another look:
So I've got this mouse. And it's still alive. And suffering. *sigh* I take pics of it, and send them to my husband. We talk over the phone. He tells me I can clock it with a shovel. Uh-huh.
I gave in and put it in a ziplock plastic baggy. I picked it up with the plastic baggy turned inside out to use as a fingerless glove. Works great. Thanks to all the lessons from picking up dog poop. ;)
Here's another picture of the cute poor little mouse:
So I picked up Mr. Mouse, and put him (or her?) on the kitchen floor, inside the plastic baggy. And then I beaned it with the handle of my husband's foot-long black flashlight.
Yes. This mouse. Down here. Beaned it. No pics of the beaning, though. Sorry. I'm not quite that twisted.
So I've been washing dishes (and coughing up a lung) ever since. The cleaned pots and pans (that the mouse ran over and in many cases, poo'd in) are all piled up on the kitchen table. Most of them... not quite done. Moving kinda slow while coughing up a lung.
Once the dishes are fully removed, I can nuke the kitchen cabinets. 'Er, I mean clean them with lysol, pinesol, or clorox. Not sure which to use. Maybe all 3.
Wish me luck.
No Mouse today, he's gone away.
To ease the pain, he's down the drain!"
Well, ok, he's not. And btw, if you can identify the above quote, I'll give you free dead mice in the mail.
Anyway, I'm sick. I caught the flu. It moved from my throat to my sinuses to my bronchial tubes. I did the fever thing. Now I'm doing the bronchial cough/exhaustion thing.
And my husband is sick. Because it wasn't enough for it to go through my body, it had to leap to his body too.
I stayed home from work this week. My husband had to fly up north and work, and sleep in a hotel room every night. :P He realized he had it about midway in his first workday up north. He's now home, after 5 hellish days for him, and very happily glued to the couch.
We have 2 big German Shepherds. Do they scare rodents away? Hell no. Do they care if we have a rodent? Not even. Do they help with killing rodents? Nope.
They have a strong prey drive. But nothing of that came out to help in this instance.
So this past Wednesday, I'm home sick, right? Coughing up a lung. And I open the doors to the cabinets to find something to eat. Hoping there's some soup I didn't realize was down there. Oooh. Look at all the little poo-like objects down there. Uh-huh.
I pulled out 2 mouse traps, and set them both. This was a major challenge for me because mouse traps scare me. Well, loud sudden noises scare me. It took me a while to get used to gunfire when my Dad taught me how to fire a gun. Little kids running around with balloons is like torture, because I know eventually they are going to pop something.
But I was sick. And something about feeling like crap made setting traps not a big deal. Just bloody had to be done.
I dropped one on the floor to hear it snap, to desensitize me. Then I proceeded to mess up and snap it on my fingers. Twice. Well, I was pretty damned well desensitized by it by then, LOL! I placed two traps Wednesday afternoon, and by Wednesday evening, we have the following:
And my first response, instead of "what a filthy, disgusting, disease ridden creature", was "oh, that poor cute little thing... and it's in pain..." Yeah, I know. I've lost it. But take another look:
So I've got this mouse. And it's still alive. And suffering. *sigh* I take pics of it, and send them to my husband. We talk over the phone. He tells me I can clock it with a shovel. Uh-huh.
I gave in and put it in a ziplock plastic baggy. I picked it up with the plastic baggy turned inside out to use as a fingerless glove. Works great. Thanks to all the lessons from picking up dog poop. ;)
Here's another picture of the cute poor little mouse:
So I picked up Mr. Mouse, and put him (or her?) on the kitchen floor, inside the plastic baggy. And then I beaned it with the handle of my husband's foot-long black flashlight.
Yes. This mouse. Down here. Beaned it. No pics of the beaning, though. Sorry. I'm not quite that twisted.
So I've been washing dishes (and coughing up a lung) ever since. The cleaned pots and pans (that the mouse ran over and in many cases, poo'd in) are all piled up on the kitchen table. Most of them... not quite done. Moving kinda slow while coughing up a lung.
Once the dishes are fully removed, I can nuke the kitchen cabinets. 'Er, I mean clean them with lysol, pinesol, or clorox. Not sure which to use. Maybe all 3.
Wish me luck.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
Jackass 2, Sushi (NOT), and Lightsabers
So, Saturday evening, October 14th, I had the (extremely guilty) pleasure of seeing Jackass 2.
I have honestly never seen Jackass 1. And I heard from friends that Jackass 1 had some scenes in it that were difficult to watch without becoming physically ill. Glad to say that although Jackass 2 has some very disgusting moments, I was able to keep down my Indian-food dinner, as was my husband.
Jackass 2... well the whole Jackass phenomenon... is just scary. I never really put stock into people complaining how computer games like Rockstar's Grand Theft Auto could cause little kids to become violent. I probably don't put much stock into it because, well, my husband and I used to be rather addicted to the game! And we have never felt the need to act on the game's violent imagery... uhm... much... :)
But this movie... I could totally see how it would influence young boys ages 8 thru ... ok, 28... to do things that are very likely to take them out of the gene pool.
I laughed my ass off during this movie. But I also cringed through it's entirety. And I still feel kindof dirty for having even seen it.
The movie was supposed to start at 7:20pm, We were meeting friends, R and L. And R brought a friend from work. At about 6pm we arrived downtown Santa Barbara, in search of sushi. There are plenty of sushi places in Santa Barbara. The ones that distinguish themselves from the crowd include Sakana (which is actually in Montecito), Pirana (whose main chef left to start Sakana), and Arrigato, which I am probably misspelling. So there we were, at Arrigato, with a 10 to 15 minute wait.
Husband took off the 2 blocks to the theatre to get tickets while I waited for our table. Then my pants started barking.
I pulled my cell phone out of my pants and answered it. [I have the ring tone set to our bigger German Shepherds bark.] My husband was on the line. "Theatre's actually more like 4 blocks down rather than 2. Maybe we'd better eat down here." I agreed, told Arrigato to cross us off the waiting list, and hightailed it in my "holy-shit-I-can-run-in-these" boots.
Whereupon we waited 10 more minutes outside the Taj for Indian food. The Taj is across from the theatre we were meeting our friends at.
Indian food wasn't what we had our hearts set on, but the Taj is an awesome place. But the waiter in question chose to memorize our order instead of write it down. So, one of our chicken dishes ended up being lamb, and we had to send it back. When the correct order arrived, but sans the raita (an awesome yogurt, onions, cilantro, and other good things dip/spread), we were reluctant to make further changes. As it was, we'd filled up on nan (a kind of flat bread... very good) and the dips that were leftover from the chips they'd served us.
Eating hot and spicy Indian food as quickly as possible is a very interesting thing to do. I was constantly blowing on the food, or drinking 7-up to try to cool my mouth down. And blowing my nose 'cause spices send my nose into a runny tailspin, even though I'm not exactly a gringo here when it comes to spices. [The tongue is willing, but the nose is weak.]
In spite of everything, we greatly enjoyed the meal at the Taj. FYI, they rarely make mistakes in orders like that, so cut them some slack, and go try out their food. :)
We made it into the theatre. The 10 minutes of previews were rolling. We probably missed the first 2. Our friends R and L saw us enter and flagged us down for the 2 seats next to them.
The theatre was not full, which was either because Jackass 2 had been out for 2 or 3 weeks, or perhaps because this theatre was far enough away from the college campus that the students weren't using it as their means of escape tonight. But that doesn't truly make sense because on any given Saturday night, I've seen tons of college students parading down State Street doing the "State Street Crawl"*, so... midterms? Maybe.
* The State Street Crawl is a time honored local tradition. It is literally trying to make your way from upper State Street to lower State Street, stopping in every bar along the way for a drink. People generally don't consider starting the crawl much higher up than Carrillo or Figueroa... the bars just aren't that thick above those cross streets.
I'm going to skip ahead now and talk about the rest of the evening. I am posting details on Jackass 2 below, under the spoiler alert. :)
So, we got out of the movie... maybe around 9pm? We were a bit dazed, and stopped by Borders for hot chocolates. I couldn't help but talk out loud to our friends, R and L, about my plans to escort S and R's daughter around for Halloween in my favorite Halloween costume, Darth Vader. I mentioned that I wanted to purchase the lightsaber that was on sale at the Borders in our neck of the woods, as my current lightsaber isn't red and is getting old. Then I noticed the girl standing in line behind my husband -- the one with the lip piercing -- who was looking at me like I was a space cadet.
It's kindof embarrassing to have someone sorta strange-looking stare at you like you're the strangest thing on the planet.
After R and L meandered to look around, I left my husband in line while I tried to quit dying of embarrassment at admitting in public that I, a grown adult, am jonesing for a replacement lightsaber. ;) [Ok, and that I'm looking forward to being Vader for Halloween.]
We hung around a Borders for a while, then left R and L, and headed, ironically, for the Borders in our neck of the woods. Husband bought a cool book, and I went to the counter to check on the price of the lightsaber.
It was gone! Sold! Aigh!
Well, so much for price comparisons with ThinkGeek. Which is where I ended up ordering my new Sithly blade from. ;) Probably just as well.
Ok, and on to the actual movie:
I suppose I should say "spoiler alert" at this point.
**************** SPOILER ALERT ****************
SCROLL
DOWN
TO
READ
SPOILERS
Ok, that's probably far enough.
How do I describe this movie? Well, did any of you ever see the South Park movie in the theatre? It was like that, but with a different kind of shock value. And it was really funny, although South Park made me laugh much harder.
But it was also extra disgusting. I mean, granted South Park touched on some pretty disgusting things, but it was all drawn in cartoon form. It's hard to be grossed out by a cartoon talking poo. A real poo, however, in the right context, can make you physically ill.
So, let's see.
The movie started out with everyone being chased through some suburban streets by cattle. The expressions on their faces were priceless. This was one of about 3 or 4 stunts involving cattle. Most were surprisingly funny, especially the one where all 4 of them are on this see-saw like contraption, and whenever the bull was running at them, the person in the "line of charge" would kick himself high up into the air, usually even drawing his legs up onto the see-saw to be safe! The goal of that see-saw prank was that the last person on the contraption won. And yes, eventually they were all knocked off, or wisely ran out of there.
Then there was a guy wearing a sock-puppet mouse over his penis. He pushed his penis through a "glory hole" wall opening into a cage containing a snake. Someone had a small string tied to the puppet, and used that to manipulate the puppet into eventually antagonizing the snake to strike. Which it did. That was one of 3 different snake incidents. *shudder*
We had several rocket-propelled-items-trying-to-fly-over-lake incidents. There was a wheelchair, a bike, a shopping cart, and an actual rocket at one point. [And yes, there was a person riding or sitting in each item.]
We had a beer bong in the anus incident. That's... probably as much as I want to say about that.
There were multiple stunts involving poo. Horse poo was eaten at one point, which caused some vomiting, ironically not by the person who was eating the poo. Horse semen was swallowed. [I thought I was going to lose it on that one...]
Four of the guys were duped into thinking they were going to a photo opportunity. Once the limo stopped, the other guys ran over, opened the skylight, dumped bees into the limo, and closed the skylight back up. The doors were rigged so the people inside couldn't get out. Marbles were placed next to one of the doors, and after a sufficient amount of screaming and flailing (and window-kicking) had occurred, someone opened up the door nearest the marbles. And yes, everyone scrambled out, slipped on the marbles, picked themselves up, and continued to run and swat at bees.
What got me was the cameraman who sat in the limo with all those bees, calmly filming the entire incident in spite of getting stung. [Hope they paid him well!]
What also got me was that on several occasions, they broke one of the cameramen. Either they grossed him out so that he vomited, or they cracked him up so that he was unable to do his job until he'd finished laughing. :) The latter was very cool.
There were several funny stunts where some guy dressed up as either an old man or an old woman. As an old man, he would be obnoxious on purpose to people to the point where you thought someone was going to hit him. At one point, he had his "grandson" with him, and while he was sitting buying some food for him, kept slipping his grandson something to drink out of his flask, and also offered him a cigarette. Some poor guy tried to save the kid from such a bad role model by asking the "old man" if he really should be giving the kid something to drink. Or smoke.
I was told that if a face was fuzzed out, that person did not sign a release to be in the film. The guy above did not have his face fuzzed out. So I think the poor guy above, who nearly came to blows with the old man at one point, got to find out it was all a joke, and that the kid wasn't really being given booze to drink. Uhm, I hope.
Another guy decided to be "bait" for sharks. He pushed a fishing hook through his cheek (I am not making this up), then jumped into the ocean to swim around. They had footage of a Mako and a Hammerhead hanging out. There were at least 2 divers in the water with the guy, one holding a camera, and the other was actually attracting sharks at one point with chum. I couldn't help but imagine the agreement they must have hashed out with the Jackass crew:
"Yes, we will do everything we can to save this guy from truly being eaten by sharks. But if he does get killed, it is NOT our fault, and we are not liable."
Oh, and the guy survived. The Mako made a pass, got kicked on the nose by the guy, and the guy with the hook in his mouth decided he'd had enough and got back on the boat.
Incidentally, for you scuba divers out there, the Hammerhead was very pretty. Not too large, though... probably a juvenile. Maybe 5 or 6 feet. Couldn't tell about the Mako... don't know how big those guys get. But he was maybe... 7 feet.
At one point they had skateboarders trying to run the gauntlet of swinging padded objects. Tony Hawk was watching the whole thing, which was cool. I can't remember if he tried to run it himself. Oh, and there were a few skateboard incidents involving jumping off houses. Well, one that I can remember for sure. :)
I can't really do this movie justice in talking about the stunts and pranks. There were way too many, and are really better viewed than described. Just know this is NOT a movie you should take little kids to. There is nudity, there is foul language. There is ALOT of poo. But worse, kids are going to want to repeat some of this stuff. Especially the skateboard stuff.
Or maybe the poo stuff.
And no, I'm not going to go into detail on the poo stuff. I started to try to write that up, but couldn't finish it.
I also tried to write up the final gag, which involved in a small part alot of pubic hair, and I just... couldn't go through with it.
Anyway, your children should not watch this. They will repeat it.
There were two little kids, between the ages of 10 and 13, who somehow got in to see this movie. When we left the theatre, they ran past us, carrying their skateboards. They had a crazed look in their eyes.
I have honestly never seen Jackass 1. And I heard from friends that Jackass 1 had some scenes in it that were difficult to watch without becoming physically ill. Glad to say that although Jackass 2 has some very disgusting moments, I was able to keep down my Indian-food dinner, as was my husband.
Jackass 2... well the whole Jackass phenomenon... is just scary. I never really put stock into people complaining how computer games like Rockstar's Grand Theft Auto could cause little kids to become violent. I probably don't put much stock into it because, well, my husband and I used to be rather addicted to the game! And we have never felt the need to act on the game's violent imagery... uhm... much... :)
But this movie... I could totally see how it would influence young boys ages 8 thru ... ok, 28... to do things that are very likely to take them out of the gene pool.
I laughed my ass off during this movie. But I also cringed through it's entirety. And I still feel kindof dirty for having even seen it.
The movie was supposed to start at 7:20pm, We were meeting friends, R and L. And R brought a friend from work. At about 6pm we arrived downtown Santa Barbara, in search of sushi. There are plenty of sushi places in Santa Barbara. The ones that distinguish themselves from the crowd include Sakana (which is actually in Montecito), Pirana (whose main chef left to start Sakana), and Arrigato, which I am probably misspelling. So there we were, at Arrigato, with a 10 to 15 minute wait.
Husband took off the 2 blocks to the theatre to get tickets while I waited for our table. Then my pants started barking.
I pulled my cell phone out of my pants and answered it. [I have the ring tone set to our bigger German Shepherds bark.] My husband was on the line. "Theatre's actually more like 4 blocks down rather than 2. Maybe we'd better eat down here." I agreed, told Arrigato to cross us off the waiting list, and hightailed it in my "holy-shit-I-can-run-in-these" boots.
Whereupon we waited 10 more minutes outside the Taj for Indian food. The Taj is across from the theatre we were meeting our friends at.
Indian food wasn't what we had our hearts set on, but the Taj is an awesome place. But the waiter in question chose to memorize our order instead of write it down. So, one of our chicken dishes ended up being lamb, and we had to send it back. When the correct order arrived, but sans the raita (an awesome yogurt, onions, cilantro, and other good things dip/spread), we were reluctant to make further changes. As it was, we'd filled up on nan (a kind of flat bread... very good) and the dips that were leftover from the chips they'd served us.
Eating hot and spicy Indian food as quickly as possible is a very interesting thing to do. I was constantly blowing on the food, or drinking 7-up to try to cool my mouth down. And blowing my nose 'cause spices send my nose into a runny tailspin, even though I'm not exactly a gringo here when it comes to spices. [The tongue is willing, but the nose is weak.]
In spite of everything, we greatly enjoyed the meal at the Taj. FYI, they rarely make mistakes in orders like that, so cut them some slack, and go try out their food. :)
We made it into the theatre. The 10 minutes of previews were rolling. We probably missed the first 2. Our friends R and L saw us enter and flagged us down for the 2 seats next to them.
The theatre was not full, which was either because Jackass 2 had been out for 2 or 3 weeks, or perhaps because this theatre was far enough away from the college campus that the students weren't using it as their means of escape tonight. But that doesn't truly make sense because on any given Saturday night, I've seen tons of college students parading down State Street doing the "State Street Crawl"*, so... midterms? Maybe.
* The State Street Crawl is a time honored local tradition. It is literally trying to make your way from upper State Street to lower State Street, stopping in every bar along the way for a drink. People generally don't consider starting the crawl much higher up than Carrillo or Figueroa... the bars just aren't that thick above those cross streets.
I'm going to skip ahead now and talk about the rest of the evening. I am posting details on Jackass 2 below, under the spoiler alert. :)
So, we got out of the movie... maybe around 9pm? We were a bit dazed, and stopped by Borders for hot chocolates. I couldn't help but talk out loud to our friends, R and L, about my plans to escort S and R's daughter around for Halloween in my favorite Halloween costume, Darth Vader. I mentioned that I wanted to purchase the lightsaber that was on sale at the Borders in our neck of the woods, as my current lightsaber isn't red and is getting old. Then I noticed the girl standing in line behind my husband -- the one with the lip piercing -- who was looking at me like I was a space cadet.
It's kindof embarrassing to have someone sorta strange-looking stare at you like you're the strangest thing on the planet.
After R and L meandered to look around, I left my husband in line while I tried to quit dying of embarrassment at admitting in public that I, a grown adult, am jonesing for a replacement lightsaber. ;) [Ok, and that I'm looking forward to being Vader for Halloween.]
We hung around a Borders for a while, then left R and L, and headed, ironically, for the Borders in our neck of the woods. Husband bought a cool book, and I went to the counter to check on the price of the lightsaber.
It was gone! Sold! Aigh!
Well, so much for price comparisons with ThinkGeek. Which is where I ended up ordering my new Sithly blade from. ;) Probably just as well.
Ok, and on to the actual movie:
I suppose I should say "spoiler alert" at this point.
**************** SPOILER ALERT ****************
SCROLL
DOWN
TO
READ
SPOILERS
Ok, that's probably far enough.
How do I describe this movie? Well, did any of you ever see the South Park movie in the theatre? It was like that, but with a different kind of shock value. And it was really funny, although South Park made me laugh much harder.
But it was also extra disgusting. I mean, granted South Park touched on some pretty disgusting things, but it was all drawn in cartoon form. It's hard to be grossed out by a cartoon talking poo. A real poo, however, in the right context, can make you physically ill.
So, let's see.
The movie started out with everyone being chased through some suburban streets by cattle. The expressions on their faces were priceless. This was one of about 3 or 4 stunts involving cattle. Most were surprisingly funny, especially the one where all 4 of them are on this see-saw like contraption, and whenever the bull was running at them, the person in the "line of charge" would kick himself high up into the air, usually even drawing his legs up onto the see-saw to be safe! The goal of that see-saw prank was that the last person on the contraption won. And yes, eventually they were all knocked off, or wisely ran out of there.
Then there was a guy wearing a sock-puppet mouse over his penis. He pushed his penis through a "glory hole" wall opening into a cage containing a snake. Someone had a small string tied to the puppet, and used that to manipulate the puppet into eventually antagonizing the snake to strike. Which it did. That was one of 3 different snake incidents. *shudder*
We had several rocket-propelled-items-trying-to-fly-over-lake incidents. There was a wheelchair, a bike, a shopping cart, and an actual rocket at one point. [And yes, there was a person riding or sitting in each item.]
We had a beer bong in the anus incident. That's... probably as much as I want to say about that.
There were multiple stunts involving poo. Horse poo was eaten at one point, which caused some vomiting, ironically not by the person who was eating the poo. Horse semen was swallowed. [I thought I was going to lose it on that one...]
Four of the guys were duped into thinking they were going to a photo opportunity. Once the limo stopped, the other guys ran over, opened the skylight, dumped bees into the limo, and closed the skylight back up. The doors were rigged so the people inside couldn't get out. Marbles were placed next to one of the doors, and after a sufficient amount of screaming and flailing (and window-kicking) had occurred, someone opened up the door nearest the marbles. And yes, everyone scrambled out, slipped on the marbles, picked themselves up, and continued to run and swat at bees.
What got me was the cameraman who sat in the limo with all those bees, calmly filming the entire incident in spite of getting stung. [Hope they paid him well!]
What also got me was that on several occasions, they broke one of the cameramen. Either they grossed him out so that he vomited, or they cracked him up so that he was unable to do his job until he'd finished laughing. :) The latter was very cool.
There were several funny stunts where some guy dressed up as either an old man or an old woman. As an old man, he would be obnoxious on purpose to people to the point where you thought someone was going to hit him. At one point, he had his "grandson" with him, and while he was sitting buying some food for him, kept slipping his grandson something to drink out of his flask, and also offered him a cigarette. Some poor guy tried to save the kid from such a bad role model by asking the "old man" if he really should be giving the kid something to drink. Or smoke.
I was told that if a face was fuzzed out, that person did not sign a release to be in the film. The guy above did not have his face fuzzed out. So I think the poor guy above, who nearly came to blows with the old man at one point, got to find out it was all a joke, and that the kid wasn't really being given booze to drink. Uhm, I hope.
Another guy decided to be "bait" for sharks. He pushed a fishing hook through his cheek (I am not making this up), then jumped into the ocean to swim around. They had footage of a Mako and a Hammerhead hanging out. There were at least 2 divers in the water with the guy, one holding a camera, and the other was actually attracting sharks at one point with chum. I couldn't help but imagine the agreement they must have hashed out with the Jackass crew:
"Yes, we will do everything we can to save this guy from truly being eaten by sharks. But if he does get killed, it is NOT our fault, and we are not liable."
Oh, and the guy survived. The Mako made a pass, got kicked on the nose by the guy, and the guy with the hook in his mouth decided he'd had enough and got back on the boat.
Incidentally, for you scuba divers out there, the Hammerhead was very pretty. Not too large, though... probably a juvenile. Maybe 5 or 6 feet. Couldn't tell about the Mako... don't know how big those guys get. But he was maybe... 7 feet.
At one point they had skateboarders trying to run the gauntlet of swinging padded objects. Tony Hawk was watching the whole thing, which was cool. I can't remember if he tried to run it himself. Oh, and there were a few skateboard incidents involving jumping off houses. Well, one that I can remember for sure. :)
I can't really do this movie justice in talking about the stunts and pranks. There were way too many, and are really better viewed than described. Just know this is NOT a movie you should take little kids to. There is nudity, there is foul language. There is ALOT of poo. But worse, kids are going to want to repeat some of this stuff. Especially the skateboard stuff.
Or maybe the poo stuff.
And no, I'm not going to go into detail on the poo stuff. I started to try to write that up, but couldn't finish it.
I also tried to write up the final gag, which involved in a small part alot of pubic hair, and I just... couldn't go through with it.
Anyway, your children should not watch this. They will repeat it.
There were two little kids, between the ages of 10 and 13, who somehow got in to see this movie. When we left the theatre, they ran past us, carrying their skateboards. They had a crazed look in their eyes.
Sunday, October 01, 2006
Bruce Campbell Book Signing
Last week, Saturday, September 23rd, in Santa Barbara, at Metro Entertainment, Bruce Campbell sat to sign books, pictures, and other paraphernalia. The line was both surprisingly and unsurprisingly long. [Surprisingly long since he is a self-proclaimed B-movie actor, and unsurprisingly long as he's a VERY GOOD self-proclaimed B-movie actor.] The line had somewhere between 175 and 200 fans of the B-movie actor in it. I managed to get to be #120.
Bruce was only signing for 2 hours, and thankfully had a known rate of 100 people/signatures per hour.
Here's a picture of my fellow Bruce Campbell obsessed fans.
The lady on the right dragged one of her daughters to the book signing. She also confessed to having forced her daughters to watch everything that has Bruce Campbell in it. She has the DVD set of The Adventures of Brisco County Jr. She has seen all of his Xena: Warrior Princess and Hercules: The Legendary Journeys episodes where he plays the character Autolycus, i.e., the Prince of Thieves. She went on and on about how he is at his best when he is playing against himself.
In the movie "Army of Darkness", Bruce plays the reluctant hero Ash. There are scenes where Bruce is the only actor on screen, but he's playing opposite himself... sometimes multiple versions of himself. She mentioned those scenes in particular, and I had to agree with her that those scenes were priceless.
In one of those aforementioned scenes, Ash is fighting with an evil incarnation of himself. He shoots the evil incarnation in an act reminiscent of Raiders of the Lost Ark, where Harrison Ford kills the swordsman with the gun rather than duel him. Then Bruce blows the smoke from the end of his shotgun and says, "Good Ash, bad Ash, I'm the one with the gun." ;)
Here's a picture of myself in line, with 2nd book ready for a signature.
His first book was quite good. It was called "If Chins Could Kill". His could. ;) Here's a picture of the two of us, with him graciously smiling for the camera.
I intended to get my copy of "If Chins Could Kill" signed by him, but I couldn't find it. My helpful husband suggested I simply have him sign my boobs! Whereupon I explained, as graciously as possible, "I like Bruce Campbell, but I don't like him in that way!"
I'm sure that's just what a tired B-movie actor needed just then... a computer geek exposing her cleavage in hopes of a permanent marker signature being placed thereon. And having that deranged look on her face that would suggest to him that I intended to "never wash that boob again". ;)
Anyway, I "settled" for purchasing his new book, and having that signed. Much less dramatic than a boob-signing, but I think he'd prefer he not have too many horror stories to tell his wife and kiddies once he's done with this book signing tour!
Bruce was very funny in person. Unfortunately, I was doing a little of the "deer caught in headlights" thing, and so kept responding in very literal-minded, deadpan fashion. This would have been good if we were working comedically together, but since I was in fact the audience...
Our conversation went something like this:
BRUCE: What's happening?
I shook his hand.
SNOOPY: Nothing much. Uhm, can you make it out to husband's-name and my-name. I'm my-name.
BRUCE: So where is this husband slacker of yours? Why isn't he here?
SNOOPY: He had to work.
BRUCE: So, what do you do?
SNOOPY: I'm a computer programmer.
BRUCE: Yeah, well, those computers do need to be programmed.
SNOOPY: Yeah...
I think I told him thank you and said goodbye. I think.
I had all these wonderful, brilliant, witty conversations with him... in my head, before I got there. I had wanted to tell him that I loved his work. And teasingly say that my husband and I are his B-fans, i.e., he's a B-grade actor, we're B-grade fans... yeah, yeah, I know, very dorky. But hey, as I said, I'm a B-grade fan. ;)
Bruce was only signing for 2 hours, and thankfully had a known rate of 100 people/signatures per hour.
Here's a picture of my fellow Bruce Campbell obsessed fans.
The lady on the right dragged one of her daughters to the book signing. She also confessed to having forced her daughters to watch everything that has Bruce Campbell in it. She has the DVD set of The Adventures of Brisco County Jr. She has seen all of his Xena: Warrior Princess and Hercules: The Legendary Journeys episodes where he plays the character Autolycus, i.e., the Prince of Thieves. She went on and on about how he is at his best when he is playing against himself.
In the movie "Army of Darkness", Bruce plays the reluctant hero Ash. There are scenes where Bruce is the only actor on screen, but he's playing opposite himself... sometimes multiple versions of himself. She mentioned those scenes in particular, and I had to agree with her that those scenes were priceless.
In one of those aforementioned scenes, Ash is fighting with an evil incarnation of himself. He shoots the evil incarnation in an act reminiscent of Raiders of the Lost Ark, where Harrison Ford kills the swordsman with the gun rather than duel him. Then Bruce blows the smoke from the end of his shotgun and says, "Good Ash, bad Ash, I'm the one with the gun." ;)
Here's a picture of myself in line, with 2nd book ready for a signature.
His first book was quite good. It was called "If Chins Could Kill". His could. ;) Here's a picture of the two of us, with him graciously smiling for the camera.
I intended to get my copy of "If Chins Could Kill" signed by him, but I couldn't find it. My helpful husband suggested I simply have him sign my boobs! Whereupon I explained, as graciously as possible, "I like Bruce Campbell, but I don't like him in that way!"
I'm sure that's just what a tired B-movie actor needed just then... a computer geek exposing her cleavage in hopes of a permanent marker signature being placed thereon. And having that deranged look on her face that would suggest to him that I intended to "never wash that boob again". ;)
Anyway, I "settled" for purchasing his new book, and having that signed. Much less dramatic than a boob-signing, but I think he'd prefer he not have too many horror stories to tell his wife and kiddies once he's done with this book signing tour!
Bruce was very funny in person. Unfortunately, I was doing a little of the "deer caught in headlights" thing, and so kept responding in very literal-minded, deadpan fashion. This would have been good if we were working comedically together, but since I was in fact the audience...
Our conversation went something like this:
BRUCE: What's happening?
I shook his hand.
SNOOPY: Nothing much. Uhm, can you make it out to husband's-name and my-name. I'm my-name.
BRUCE: So where is this husband slacker of yours? Why isn't he here?
SNOOPY: He had to work.
BRUCE: So, what do you do?
SNOOPY: I'm a computer programmer.
BRUCE: Yeah, well, those computers do need to be programmed.
SNOOPY: Yeah...
I think I told him thank you and said goodbye. I think.
I had all these wonderful, brilliant, witty conversations with him... in my head, before I got there. I had wanted to tell him that I loved his work. And teasingly say that my husband and I are his B-fans, i.e., he's a B-grade actor, we're B-grade fans... yeah, yeah, I know, very dorky. But hey, as I said, I'm a B-grade fan. ;)
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