Sunday, December 16, 2007

A bird in the bathroom is worth... huh?

So, Saturday 12/15/2007, in the morning, I've just put Logan back into his bassinet after feeding and/or changing. I stop to read a little bit before closing my eyes for more sleep. I see movement out of the corner of my eyes.

It's small. And fast. And too high up for dogs. And it's in the bathroom.

A bird has found it's way into the bathroom through the hole in the screen. And it's bouncing back and forth in a panic between our bathroom mirrors and the bathroom window... but unfortunately, not the screen part of the window. Rather the bright, lighted frosted glass to no-where part, that birdy doesn't understand is a solid object.

I head into the bathroom, and close the door. I don't want the bird escaping into the bedroom and pooping all over everything, especially Logan!!!

I grab a plastic bag on the floor and put it over my hand inside-out, and proceed to chase the poor thing all over. And I'm barefoot, which I didn't think of in time before I went in there.

The bird hides between all our crap on the counter, occasionally leaving it's own crap there as well. And flies behind the toilet. And flies into the trash can on top of the toilet.(1) And flies up onto the shelves above the toilet. And towards the door, where it sees a crack under the door that it might squeeze through. And as I try to corner it by the door, it flies between my legs. I can feel it's feathers brush my legs as it swoops past, and mentally tick off something else I'll need to wash once I'm done, LOL!

Finally, it flies towards the trash can on top of the toilet a 2nd time. I check, but that's not where it is. Oh, it's somewhere under the toilet. In the toilet brush holder!!!

I snag that, and make sure the lid is secure, and walk out with my trapped birdy. Hubby is passed out, having taken "smelly hippie"(2) to ensure a good night's sleep.

I wake him briefly, to show him that I've captured a bird, explaining that it was flying back and forth between the window and the mirror, slowly bashing itself to death. I explain there's probably bird doo on the floor, and the counter next to the sink, so to be careful until I get it cleaned up. Then I take it outside and release it. Hubby passes back out.

I come back in, and rinse off feet and legs. I know I should have used soap, but was so tired by that time, I gave up. I crawled back into bed.

Tired hubby gets up a few hours later and wanders into the kitchen. Looking for bird doo there, LOL! And seeing none, assumes I've already cleaned it up. But is at a loss to understand why the bird was banging from the mirror near thew front door, all the way to the sliding glass door in the living room. :) [The sliding glass door also has a screen door with a big hole in it.]

We're both so tired, neither of us has made sense or understood each other for a couple of weeks, LOL!!!


(1) If you have dogs, you probably understand the necessity of keeping bathroom trash cans on top of the toilet. :) If you don't... nevermind...

(2) Smelly Hippie is what we call Unisom. There's an episode of Futurama where Lur of Omicron Persei 8 eats a hippie that's got some pot or something in his system. At one point, Lur says something to the effect of, "Whoa... this hippie's starting to kick in!!!!" :)

1 comment:

Bart said...

Just wandered here, hope you don't mind. We had a bat in our house one night. I never knew I was afraid of bats until I found myself crawling around on my hands and knees trying to keep track of where it was flying. My wife came home right in the middle of the fiasco as I was stalking thru the house with the long handled pool skimmer trying to find where it landed... Long story short.. We got it out by throwing a towel over it. It came back in later that night (I swear it was the same one) and our cat ate it! yum